Mu nthawi yachiwiri yausiku, ndimayimirira kukhitchini yoyenda-theka, ndidasilira skillet wotsatira - sanafanane ndi mbale yotsuka. Mnyumbamo, chete ndi mtendere, ndi malingaliro amtendere a ana atatu ndi tate wa banja. Ndipo m'mutu mwanga chipumuridwe, konse: pamadzi olemetsa ndi malo oyang'anira oyang'anira, monogie anali opindika.
"Sindinayerekeze moyo wanga konse ... momwe ndidatopa ... ndimafunira thandizo kwambiri, koma palibe amene amabwera ... Zomwe ndimagwiritsa ntchito zaka zanga! Miphika iyi ndi ma diaper akhala mwa ine m'chiwindi ... kuti sindinachite cholakwika cholakwika? .. ine ndikufuna kuchita zomwe mumakonda, kuchita china chomwe chingawonekere ndikuwunika. .. "
Vuto lazowopsa kuchokera osakhutira ndi kukhumudwa, kutaya mtima ndi chiyembekezo chofunda pabwalo laukadaulo, nanny, zowonjezera, ndalama, kuyenda, kuyenda.
Gawo la ine silinataye zotsalazo zanzeru ndipo adawonedwa modabwa ndi zojambulajambula izi. Ndidadzifunsa kuti: "Kodi ndi chiyani? Kodi ndi mfundo iti yomwe ili m'mabasi awa? Dzigwire nokha ndi kusiya kulira, sonkhani! " Popanda kunena kuti kupembedza kumeneku kunandithandiza kwambiri - inenso ndioneni kuti ndinazindikira kuti ndimamumvera chisoni, ndikusiya zowawa kwambiri.
Zinthu zinali choncho. Ndinali maola 24 tsiku la ana. Pamene ana aakazi a zaka 3 ndi 5 akhala akusukulu, ndinali mwana wamwamuna wazaka chimodzi, kenako tinapita kukawasankhira limodzi, kenako the Ribilovo "inayamba.
Sindine mayi wokongoletsera kwambiri komanso wovala wokongola kwambiri, choncho ndi bungwe la zosangalatsa za ana, kupatula mabwalo ndi zigawo ndi zigawo, ndikuchita chinthu choyipa. Nkhondo yosapeweka ndi kusamvana pakati pa ana zimandipangitsa kuti "tizifunikira" mu mawonekedwe osayimitsidwa: Bwerani-Bullshit-Pellets-Pellets-tout-tor-toled kwathunthu popanda mphamvu.
Ndikadakhala kuti chisangalalo chachikulu chinatha ntchito kuti ndigwire ntchito yosangalatsa kuti muitane ndi chidwi ndi Nanny: "Kodi ana ali bwanji?". Koma pakali pano njira iyi sinawerengeredwe konse.
Kuphatikiza apo, tchuthi cha Khrisimasi chayandikira patsogolo, ndipo izi (aptung! AkhTung!) Pafupifupi milungu itatu popanda sukulu. Ndipo sitipitanso kulikonse, mwamunayo akupitilizabe kugwira ntchito, motero, ziyenera kuti zitheke ndi zosangalatsa ine, osachoka ku ofesi yamabokosi.
Pamalo osewerera - o, masamba awa omwe amadedwa ndi ine amaluma ndi kusinthana! - May physigognomy adawona mayi wina pasukulu yathu.
- Muli bwanji?
- Nuuu, fionov, - ndimayankha ndi Acidi acidi. - Ndimaganiza za tchuthi chobwera ... Sindimapulumuka milungu ino.
- Ndipo mukudziwa, ndinali ndi ine. Ndipo kenako ndinadziuza ndekha kuti palibe chobadwa. Sizithandiza konse: sizivuta kuchokera ku kulira kwamkati, kokha pazonsezi.
Ndipo anayamba kundiuza za buku lotchuka "kukumbukira" (ku Chikuru cha Chira aku Russia), zokhudzana ndi a John Keho, zomwe adazichezera ku South Africa, za kusintha komwe zinachitika m'moyo wake kwakanthawi.
Ndipo sindikudziwa chifukwa chake, koma mawu ake onse adayamba kukwaniritsa cholingachi - chimawoneka, malowa, nthawi ndi vuto langa. Osachepera, zinali zosiyana kwambiri ndi muyezo wa "muyenera kuvutika, anawo posachedwa amakula," "Mudaganiza chiyani ndikabereka atatu?" Mumakonda " Sangalalani "pafupi.
Mwadzidzidzi ndinakumbukira nthawi ino pamene zinali ngati zomwezi, kusintha ntchito. "Nditatopa bwanji ... Ndakhala ndikusowa moyo wanga wonse kuti ndigwire muudindo pa amalume ... Sindidzakhala ndi banja ..." Ndidayesanso kupeza njira, ndidawerenga za malire, Anadutsa "moyo wonse" kuchokera ku kutumphuka mpaka kutumphuka ndipo mpaka anayang'ana mafayilo "chinsinsi" (amayi anga, amanga maso a phirilo). Mwa njira, zidathandiza: Zaka zisanu ndi ziwirizo pali banja, ndipo chinanso ndi chiyani!
Mwambiri, zikuchitika, mlanduwo sunali nthawi zonse. Kukhala kapena kusasangalala ndikukhutira ndi moyo ndi kusankha kwathu. M'kati mwanga ngati kuti kuwalako kunayatsidwa, ndipo nthawi imeneyo ndidaganiza kuti: siyinalinso kulira. Sindidandaula za moyo kapena ena. Ndidzasokoneza mawu a bitland aliwonse. Ndifufuza ndikungoyang'ana zabwino zokha, ndikhoza zanga zonse.
Sindinganene kuti zinali chabe. Zinafuna kudziletsa. Ndinkada nkhawa kuti sindingapambane: mndandanda womwe waphedwa ndi zosankha zomwe sizinachitike si kavalo wanga konse. Koma chozizwitsa china chinatha.
Kwenikweni, malamulo a masewerawa anali osavuta: kuti udutse chilichonse chokha, lingalirani zabwino. Tsiku lililonse zikomo: Khalani ozungulira, moyo. Mobwerezabwereza.
Ndipo zosintha zidayamba. Zinali zodziwikiratu kuti sizingachitike kuti sizingadabwe. Maholide athu a Khrisimasi adadzaza ndikutenthetsedwa, ndipo kunalibe kumverera kutopa kwamuyaya ndi ana. Mwamunayo adalimbitsa mtima mwaulere ndi wokondwa, chifukwa ndidasiya kuyikapo ndi vuto. Kale koyambirira kwa Januware, panali mwayi wopatsa mwana kumunda kwa maola anayi patsiku. Maola anayi a ufulu - ndizofunika kwambiri!
Kupitilira apo. Mwadzidzidzi, zinatheka kuchita zinthu zomwe amakonda - nyimbo, zinakhala chiwongola dzanja kwenikweni, chinandipatsa mphamvu zopanga, zomwe nthawi yomweyo zidathupi. Pamapeto pake ndinalemba nkhani za ana omwe amakhala kwazaka zambiri pathanthwe. Ndinaganiza zobwerera kuntchito yoyambirira ya mtolankhani komanso mkonzi - ndi malingaliro a ntchito idayamba kulandira kwathunthu kuchokera kwina kulikonse. Chifukwa chake ndidabwezeretsedwa kwa ine gawo lofunika kwambiri m'moyo wanga, sindinkakondanso 100% yotengedwa ndi mabanja ndi ana.
Sindine akatswiri onse oganiza bwino. Ndipo kuchokera kwa ine, zachidziwikire, kusweka ndi chisoni kudachitikabe. Koma mwa umodzi tsopano ndili wotsimikiza chimodzimodzi. Pakakhala zoipa, akakhala achisoni, osungulumwa, opanda chiyembekezo - titha kudzithandiza tokha. Ngati sizotheka kupeza thandizo kuchokera kunja, onetsetsani kuti: Mphamvu zonse ndi nzeru zonse zili mkati mwathu, muyenera kungoyang'ana kwambiri m'moyo wanu.
Mafanizo: Shuttlando