Violent relationships can be difficult to avoid for many reasons, the most common among which are fear, denial and dependence. But abuse can occur in many forms.
Some types of violence, such as beating and sexual violence, are physical. Other types, such as psychological and emotional violence, may be harder to recognize, but they are no less destructive.The psychological or emotional violence includes verbal aggression, dominant behavior, manifestation of jealousy, as well as any actions aimed at undermining self-esteem and self-esteem or threat to harm. And the fact that this does not leave bruises or scars, this does not mean that psychological violence can not have a long exposure.
1. Partner always wants to know your location
Psychological violence can take the form of obsessive control. However, in the early stages of relationships, it can be easily adopted for attentiveness and care; And this can be even flattering.
The partner may begin to appear on your work without warning to "invite for lunch." Then he wants to know what you did during the day, and with whom you did it. This can all grow into completely unhealthy actions, for example, in installing spyware on your digital devices. As an example, you can bring a partner who tries as far as possible to remove you from family and friends.
2. They can take meanness, then suddenly become "pleasant"
Partners - emotional rapists can carry out control over their victims, damaging their self-esteem. They tell you the blasting confidence in themselves or constantly criticize clothes, the appearance and what you do. They can also obsessed with such things as your weight, and upset if you do not meet their requirements and standards.But suddenly, sudden changes may happen to them - especially if they feel that they can lose you. "After the resentment or anger, I apologize and the assurances in love are often followed, such as:" I can't live without you, "" I will never say that anymore "or" I didn't mean it at all. "
This is all not what it seems. Emotional rapists simply do not have sympathy - it's just another form of manipulation to keep victims under your control.
3. Everything has its own argument.
Disputes are constantly taking place in all pairs, but in offensive relationships the ratio of forces is always unilateral. But if every disagreement ends with the victory of your partner, it is clearly not all right in relationships.
Each partner in a pair should be able to disagree and talk. But the "aggressive" partner will be less concerned about a rational discussion than maintaining control over you and your opinions. For him, meaning is to intimidate you.
4. Are you afraid to talk to him
You can learn a lot about your relationship not only by how your partner has, but by how you feel. You may be afraid to affect major topics, for example, because of the fear of how it reacts.If you feel embarrassed - this is another sign that everything is wrong. For example, a partner may appear at your work without warning or he asking you to make certain sexual actions that you do not want to do.
The ability to speak is openly important not only for your mental health, but also for the health of your partner. If there is no such thing, it strongly limits your proximity.
5. Nevertheless, he is in the first place
Perhaps the worst in emotional and psychological violence - how much partner can be gradual and insidious. Often people do not realize that they became victims until all their lives change, and they are completely under the spells of their offender.
The partner-rapist should always be the center of your universe; When you obey, then your "I" slowly begins to dissolve until you become an appendage.
What to do about it
Psychologists explain that the ability to identify problem behavior is crucial because the offender will try to convince you that in all your wines. Immediately you need to clarify the situation and make it clear that you respect yourself and expect the same respect for him.
If the abuses continue, you need to ask your partner to go on therapy. If the partner refuses and cannot (or does not want to change) his behavior, it's time to leave.
"Despite the soreness of parting, it will be less destructive than staying in relations with emotional violence.