With the birth of your own children, the interests of even the best parents depart into the background. The child becomes the whole universe, with its laws and rules, desires and needs. The newly-made parents spend all their time and spend all the energy to raise the child, try to ensure it all necessary for life and give a maximum of all spheres. But the time comes when you have to overestimate the situation. This moment comes when the children grow up, and the wretched and energetic parents are aging.
Older people no longer cope with household troubles, they need not only in care and attention, but also in financial support. Grass children still require attention, money, money. There is a conflict of interest - resources are missing at all.On whose side to become, who love and concern is more necessary, how do not miss something very important in the life of children and provide a decent old age to parents?
All these problems tend to fall on the shoulders of a woman. It is she who struggles to be a good daughter, remaining a flawless mother. But keep the balance is unbearably difficult! And any overcast is fraught with consequences. What to do? Who is more important - children or parents? Who will live without attention and help?
What will happen if you devote enough time to children?
Choose between children and parents is difficult. It is especially difficult for those who have excellent parents. Although sometimes it seems that the choice is obvious. Children begin to distance. They have their own circle of communication and their interests. Gratitude to parents are great.
Parents gave life, provided housing, gave education .... The list of merit may be infinite. The better the parents belong to children, the stronger the attachment, a sense of duty and a sense of responsibility. Children try to compensate for the benefits sometimes even to the detriment of their health and their own interests. And at that moment, grown children, devoid of parental care and affection, can become overwhelming, disabled, quick-tempered, offended. Ignoring the needs and desires of the child can provoke constant conflicts in the family, lead to serious complexes and to underestimated self-esteem. To get rid of those who have arisen, may need a lifetime.
By side effects of attention deficit may be:
- theft;
- cruelty;
- hysterical;
- aggression;
- depression.
In adolescence, when a child has an unnecessary sensation, he is inclined to rapid actions and even suicide. Therefore, it is always important to be next to the children, to know their problems, desires, needs. On time, a good word, tender hugs, joint pastime - an important stage in the development and formation of children. You can not miss this time. It is important to just be together. Every year, month, day, hour ... This time cannot be shown or compensated.
Therefore, children should be in the first place. Their life just begins and depends on you how they will live. You must be near the children always. To rest together, work, learn. And help the elderly parents. Because respect for elderly people and parents, including, should be laid in childhood. And the best lessons are the lessons of life. Show children on your own example, as needed to treat elderly people, elderly parents. Teach young children to read the elderly, and adolescents are respect and helping grandparents. Attracting children to care for old parents, you can pay time and the other at the same time.
Children should know that old age is a very difficult period in life, when close, native people become weak, defenseless, cannot care for themselves, cook, buy products, go to the store, pharmacy, visit doctors. A kind relation can be demonstrated not only by physical help, which children can not always have, but also warm words of support, participation, love.
It is important not to overdo it!
Providing comfortable life to parents and decent life to children, it is important to remember that there is also one's own life. It is impossible to ignore your desires, interests and needs. Therefore, it is worth delegate some cases related to the care of the elderly parents to close relatives.
It is not necessary to take absolutely all troubles around the house, without leaving your parents, no opportunity to take themselves with something. Easy work, easy classes give them the opportunity to feel necessary and useful. Parents may well help grandchildren with some lessons, making crafts or with drawings. Your task is not to break between children and parents, but to learn to coexist in such a way that everything was comfortable. A large, friendly family is not a gift of fate, but daily work and joint efforts. If you have excellent parents and good children, you do not have to make a choice.