The new year is approaching, and the degree of stress and the total inadequate is growing in geometric progression. How can you guess, he will reach the highest point exactly December 31. What to wait from your neighbor? Check with stars! Warned - it means armed!
Capricorn
If by 8 am on December 31, you will not find a coated table with three changes with the pastries, caviar of red, black and overseas eggplant, - Pleep it with a wand. In the course, it is a dead Capricorn. Everything has been so captured that he is ready to withstand a three-day siege with champagne, Olivier and half-lane strippers, so on the last day of the year he can afford to relax slightly - that is, to cover the table not by 8 am, and by 8.30.
Aquarius
Aquarius in the morning full of bold plans for the conquest of the universe, peace and neighbor's cat for surrender. Before the fight of the Kurats, he will have time to swingly enter the world history, invent the medicine from AIDS, prove the farm theorem, get drunk, sneak and start all over again. In short, Aquarius in the New Year's cure is not a joke. But seeing him in such a state very difficult, because in the most interesting place he tagging "You are here, and I went to sleep." And goes to sleep.
Fish
Fishes are just waiting on December 31, so that with a clean conscience start drinking right in the morning. And drunk fish can brighten anyone, even the most nervous day of New Year's day by throwing caviar, dancing on the tables and nothing awry fun. For hours by 4 days, she, however, most likely be caught and sleeping, but not long. Wakes up - and again into battle, dancing on the table, waving shorts, juggles a salad bowl, laughs and sings songs! And so until January 10. We warned.
Aries
If the Aquarius only builds plans for the conquest of the world, then the Aries are truly and concentrated by these plans to implement, not paying attention to some new year there. Therefore, if it seems that it is calm and relaxed, - won in shorts and home coat - then know what it just seems. And God forbid you sadness to drink with airy before 10 pm! You will go to Leningrad, marry a blonde teacher of Russian and good Ipolyte to offend how much in vain.
calf
The main thing is to survive the moment when the calf woke up and found himself in time and space. After that, you can bring him a charm of coffee with brandy and - Voila! - We are on the health of ropes from a gentle and gentle calf. I am doing a velvet nose, looking in love with eyes and is ready for almost everything. You just do not overdo it with brandy, otherwise you risk getting a high-quality jet and piano in the bushes instead of fur coats and diamonds. Under window.
Twins
How to host the twin on December 31, it depends in which of the sublipses this miracle will wake up. Chances, as you understand, FIFTI FIFTI: You can get a company dude, which and Olivier in dust will be pounding, and on the rock and roll guitar, it will open the wine to the eye, or the gloomy devilish Furia, which hates people, animals and in general this bl @ # $% cue holiday, which is incomprehensible to whom you need. And well, if she decides to send everyone to the ass and go to bed - after the third gland, the twins will move to the methodical destruction of hated.
Cancer
For cancer on December 31, the same day, like everyone else, so he sincerely puzzles, which everyone is worn with the Christmas trees over the shoulder and why the mother-in-law (by the way, a very distinguished person, a professor!) In the morning I drink brandy in the morning. The only way to bring this boring articular in a normal festive mood is to drink. Drunk cancer is quite another thing, he is immediately opened to the world and is ready to kill for the whole Rus Mother.
a lion
Lion on the eve goes to bed early and in a dress with sparkles, so that at 15 am the thirty-first one to wake up and immediately shine himself to the world, celebrate the new year, burn the Bengal lights, celebrate and eat in every way. To stop the lion in the festive mood can only aimicant nuclear strike. Or handcuffs and battery. Although he will find a company there.
Virgo
Virgo reads this horoscope and sincerely puzzled: what, in fact, maybe options for the last day of the outgoing year? Wipe dust - this time, spending - these are two, go to the store - these are three, cook food - these are four ... and so on. No doubt, under paragraph 138, it is "meeting the New Year". And to losers, not able to plan your own time, Virgo does not apply, so!
Libra
As a rule, scales belong to the rare category of people, who either by December 31 managed everything and can now calmly relax, or able to put on an all huge bolt and also calmly relax. Because the scales have already decided where, how and with whom the new year will be celebrated, so this is a rare case when they can pour champagne with a clean conscience and conveniently get a telly with a New Year program. True, here they lie down the flour of choice, because to decide, the "irony of fate" or "sorcerers" - non-WHO WHO - BUT!
Scorpio
If you saw pictures on which a luxurious woman in a silk bathrobe and stockings on a boss foot sits in front of the mirror, mysteriously smiles and looks into the distance, then you can easily imagine how to spend December 31 scorpion. It is not worth seduced: he does not dream of peace all over the world or some kind of garbage, oh, no! Most likely, his thoughts are busy with those who are on the New Year's party to stare in the ass and quickly drag off in his noury. And there are silk, stockings, that's all.
Sagittarius
December 31 for Sagittarov - the only day when everything finally can go on it, Sagittarovoy, plan. It is better to obey and do everything as he wants, otherwise, at a minimum, he crushes the brain with stories about how no one does not like him, but as a maximum, disadvantages, will leave in the night of a deaf, barefoot and proliferate, drink bitter and look for new friends . The worst thing - can find!
