Palm sweat, thought jumps, it seems to you that you look like a fool, it does not come to mind a single witty thought. Joy of human communication? Oh well.
Social anxiety is a completely ordinary thing. Not everyone is born to the soul of the company. But overcome the stupor for anyone.
Think
Our brain has one amazing feature: we can either think and analyze or feel. It is proven to dozens of experiments - scientists made the alarming people play Tetris, represent how they go around the city on the excursion bus, solve mathematical tasks, press the button when the light bulb is lighting up, spread the solitaire.
The result is one - any activity requiring at least minimal intellectual efforts, sharply lowers an emotional response. Any emotional response - that is why in rare moments of complete happiness, try not to think about anything and analyze anything.
This phenomenon can be used to combat tension. Of course, playing Tetris at a party is not a very good idea. But you can try in detail to present the story that Vasya says, or try to guess how Masha will react to this story. Intellect is busy, anxiety smokes on the sidelines.
Use your strengths
Do not try to imitate an extrovertness with acceleration - do not take this bastion with a bobby, and if you are in a big company afraid of our mouths to reveal, then do not expect that it properly prepared and slamming a couple of Ryumashek, you will win the audience and make everyone laugh at your stories. But your character has a bright side: among those who are just waiting for their turn to speak out - the only good listener. Why there is good - you are a great listener. Attentive and full empathy. Repeat this more often instead of "Lord, what I do here."
Expect the worst
Imagine the most monstrous scenario: you are trying to joke and ... Guests will win you by candelabras? Demonstantly moved away and grindly cross it? They will be asked to repeat the joke, the video will be recorded and put it on Utyub with the signature "the most idiotic joke of the year"? Not. Most likely, nothing will happen. Yes, for this evening, everyone will say and make something ridiculous, about your confusion will just forget.
Imagine that this is a game
Party in the company - this is not to say so that a very serious thing. But for you it may be the most real stress. Exactly until you imagine that this is something like a simple game, in which it is impossible to lose, or scenes from Sitkom with an awesome rating. By the way, the American "sea seals" also enjoy the same admission, which immediately teach to perceive brutal workouts as the game - it reduces anxiety and increases endurance.
Switch from "I" on "You"
I said something wrong? I look normally? Are they bored with me? What to answer him? All these questions constantly drive dance in the head at a socially alarming person, and they all spin around "I". Concentrating on yourself, you only increase the level of anxiety. Sew focus with "I" on "You", that is, try to think about others and stop analyzing your own kind and behavior. It is very simple: listen to a person, in touch with what he says, ask leading questions, give up and do big eyes in particularly dramatic turns of the plot. No one is waiting for each of your replica will be a pearl wisdom or a joke worthy of Eddie Murphy. Simple things like "oh well!", "And she answered Cho?" And "This is Lenka, redhead or black?" Also work perfectly well and provide you with a reputation as a man of spiritual and open.
