Psychologists call these comrades passive-aggressive. Hands he does not raise, the voice will not elevate, but will bring so that you yourself will run and yell. And the sabotage will shrug and explain why you are to blame for this. How he does it?
Doing nothing
"Nitsi" is a sabota motto. He never admits that he is angry, even if the rivals on his cheeks can already be nuts. So, instincts suggest you that a man is in rabies (posture, gestures, intonation), and the mind says that "it means" it means "everything is normal, we act further according to plan." Double message pounds in a dead end. I do something wrong? What? Maybe stop doing something at all?Well as you know
Sabadeger does not know how to discuss plans. He quickly comes out of himself and retreats, throwing the dissatisfied "do, as you know!" Of course, it was not a permit to flow at its discretion. The phrase is translated "shut up already and somehow guess what I want. And do. " But since you are not a telepath, then you, of course, are not guess, and it will be very, very dissatisfied. In this, there is a sabotage target: to show how you are Fauley, when you do not guess his thoughts.I'm coming
The sabotage never says "no". He does not need it, because his word and his things have completely different things. For example, you say: "Let's postpone the refrigerator together," he says: "Yeah" and quietly buys the super-headphones to the pending money. "Take away, please, the child is in training" - "right now, I am," says the sabotage and go to brew tea. In the end, you will learn about the torn plans at the last moment, and you have no time and time for disassembly, because you need to urgently correct the situation.And what, right now it was necessary?
But if you still put a question with an edge, when the sabotechnoe is once again a proficiency in an important thing, he will pretend that he misunderstood you. Departure abroad in two weeks, so, the passport had to already be changed? Here just then when did you say? Oh, well, you would generally remember for 2 days. Well, now I do not even know. It was necessary to say something like louder.You do not please
You can not get out of the house, leaving a sick child, and ask for a sabota to buy food to dinner on the way from work. He brings shelter to Korean carrots and a can of beer. And what, this is his dinner today, since you did not prepare anything. That's forever you do not please. It is necessary to give more accurate instructions. And in general, it is not a sabotage curves and malfunctions, it is some kind of perfectionism. Excellent manipulation! For the second time you will not risk it to ask him about something and do everything herself. Do you know what he will say when you fall? "So I asked me, I did it!"I thought you know
The sabotage is not interested in your plans and easily breaks them. Suppose you agreed that on Saturdays, we retire together in the apartment, and on Sunday we walk with a child in the park. A passive aggressive comrade may wanted to go to visit friends instead for one day to visit friends or invite them home. This is normal! But he will never tell about it in advance, but will put you before the fact, say, in the morning of Saturday. "Didn't I warn? And it seemed to me that we talked. Well, for sure, remember, I said after the new year that I want to see with Vitaly? "Not bad. For Middle Um
At the moments when the support is important to you, the sabotechnoe knows how to bloom such that you want to lie down and do nothing more. He has a subtle feeling of moment. The more importantly the family celebration or the business meeting to which you are preparing, the more appropriate will be his comments. Prepared seven changes in dishes? Bread cutting you best have succeeded, love. Did the whole report amounted to a report? Do not worry so much you will close in the crisis.Yes, I joked!
The sabotechnology shows aggression in a socially acceptable form - that is, in the form of a joke. This is a double benefit. If you show your offense, you will demonstrate that you are, firstly, deprived of a sense of humor, and secondly, very aggressive and offend it with it. So he has full right proudly offend you in response. Inflate and suffer. Not understood. Rejected. In this system, the right to insult is only from him.What do you hysteriate?
What the sabotuer will not refuse, so it is in the ability to maintain peace of mind when everyone around is already letting smoke from the ears, communicating with him. He even like it. Drivers to inadequate, and then asks: "Well, what are you? Well, you at all. And how to talk with you at all, alone emotions! "So be!
Passive-aggressive can sabotage even parting with them! Try to throw it, and you know that, first of all, you literally crushed him, shocked and killed by your cruel decision. Secondly, do not think that he does not understand how much problems you have. You are to blame for them, but he is ready to forgive you. Thirdly, let's work on our relationship! So he is absolutely for. It is already on the sofa. Everything, and he will not go anywhere. He, you, fool, loves, and who, with such a hysterical, will still agree to live.