Ask almost any young woman to write a item from ten things that she hates, and four of ten items will be about what she hates himself.
For weakness, for stupidity, for failure, for the fact that a bad mother or wife. Many are written in terms of qualities, units are discharged frankly: "I hate yourself."
Although each read gloss and heard of psychologists' tips from the TV: "Just love yourself, and everything will be fine and right in life."
After these tips, they hate even more. Now for the fact that they cannot love themselves. But this, as we remember from the general formula, simply.
In fact, it does not work. There is no one in the world, even himself, even the mother and the Bloody-Daughter, can not be forced to love himself. Love or appears, or not.
You can try to stop hateing yourself. But meditation in front of the mirror will not help. And there is no magic spell on this case.
Need a doll. Any, better animal. This doll is clumsy, stupid, does not cope. She has all those flaws for which you (and anyone else) hates themselves. Why not beat it, do not humiliate, do not deprive delicious food and the trip, which she dreamed of three years? This is good, to punish the one who does not have enough strength, knowledge, anything. Tell her it out loud. Imagine her old woman. The old woman's quality is the same, only worse, because old age has taken strength from her, now she copes even less, you are, nasty! It is necessary to punish it, because you will be the same. Is it normal, hate someone like you? How about mirging?
And now the old woman is a child. Stronger and smarter, she did not, and it was no one to protect it, you can punish a pocket girl how much soul. So that never bold smile! You can even so, to delight and take joy, so even more prison. By the way, the girl cries, hate it? If you hate yourself when we cry, then it is necessary, this is disgusting, when someone hurts that he cries, you know that it is disgusting.
It is normal to hate someone who is bad.
Or not?
You know what you really are not?
Normally, who cries, console. Hug to protect. To say that it is difficult to happen, and very disappointing when I could not manage, and sometimes it helps to go only with small steps, and sometimes there are no other people who reproaches unfair, and they can not be trusted. Comforting who cries. He is very necessary.
And then take this toy with you, mentally or indeed. She will be a little you, like the old woman and that child. When you are scared, offensively and hurt, she will pay. And you comforty, stupid and clumsy, and be sure to offer assistance. It is difficult for it to cope, and in the smallest chagelter, maybe it will be easier.
And the reason to stop hateing only one. Hate abnormally. Especially for weakness, stupidity, clumsy or what someone hurts. Anyone. And you, yes, also anyone.
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