That's just everything was just fine. You are already a big girl and already know what is important, and what is the husk and sand traces leading to the beach toilet. You have a family, work and friends, tested by time. And a cheerful dog that understands you from a half pass. You are still young and beautiful. But why so sad, and? What is so sad?
And this, dear, the middle-aged crisis is selected to you. And it, unfortunately, not to avoid. PICS gathered all the main symptoms of this nasty. Hold on, we are with you!Symptom 1. You think about it today
"I'll think about it tomorrow" - the quote is ingenious. Because truthful. You still lived all three decades. The problem is that tomorrow has become in today. Of course, some questions have lost relevance - you no longer have to think about why Petrishchev changed you so much, you're already 15 years old as a lawyer sausage, and Petrishchev has a car mechanic and takes a loan for the purchase of a refrigerator, Ha ha ha. But there is still a lot of questions, and the most terrible is the question "I could become when I grow up." Because he sounds now: "Who should I become when I am?". I would like to immediately become a rush, quietly lying in a beautiful malachite-green urn and not to think about anything. Because thinking is unbearable.
Output: Do not think it will not work, alas. It will not be possible to think positively too, leave hope, everyone who has lived. And the usual psychotropic drugs do not help: got drunk, you will turn on the Kolotnikov kolotnikov on YouTube, and this is the right way to the abyss. Because your recent fifteen, turns out, farther from you, than your future fifty.
If it is bad at all, do not turn your chlipky internal resource, but go to the doctor. He will give a magic tablet and life is not that will play with paints - she will just come back. And if everything is not so bad - it's nice! Horses on the crossing do not change, as they say. Coffee - a horse of black, pizza - horse red, vodka - horse white, morning - Bale's horse. At least something does not change, yes?
Symptom 2. You do not know yourself in the mirror
Because there is not quite a girl. Natural is not quite a girl - with wrinkles, an extinct look and dim pacles instead of the mermaid hair. Your body has changed. It made you in one way. It should not have grown so early! Or consciousness should also be performed, but inside you no longer than twenty five. Return everything back!Output: In any incomprehensible situation, download the ass. No, this is true an affordable advice - even if you are slightly like a cypress, you lose your muscle mass, and fat - build up. This is nature. From her point of view, you have to stop looking for roots and berries in a radius of a hundred kilometers, but it's time to be in a cave and maintain the hearth. Horror. Nature is generally a heartless creature, and that you just understood. When it became clear that the creams, injections and cryotherapy were impossible against genetics.
On the other hand, Bay Enemy is his own weapon. Your sadness about the inevitable aging powerless against the endorphins, which in you directly boil at the moment when you charge someone for the first time in the jaw. We want to say - do not go to yoga. This is for girls and old women. Go on boxing, taekwondo or kickboxing. You are now absolutely necessary not only to move and raise muscles, but someone else to get to bloody snot. With impunity.
Symptom 3. You will be worsering separation with children
Caution! Dangerous moment! Because your children are most likely almost adolescents. And they have their own crisis there. Of course, you have already imagined how they leave you - the old woman is a mother wrapped in a drain Orenburg handkerchief. And from the soul melted her bitter share. Do you remember yourself in Pubtat? Lodaki did not understand you because they did not understand anything at all! So - we let you go away your sins: it's not you did all kinds of omissions, these are your parents suffering from the crisis of middle-aged and imagined themselves by trilobites. Do not repeat their mistakes, yeah?
Output: You were born at the end of the seventies - at the beginning of the eighties, right? We inform: Kostya Kinchev is not just alive. He still looks like a dranny wild cat and sings about the fact that the compromise is not for us. And still charges the hall so that even the fans of "affectionate May" fall into a nostalgic hysteria. Go with a child - you will not regret. Sibling will imbued, you - you charge. Tickets - five five. To be with a child in one wave - invaluable. Checked by the author to live himself.
Symptom 4. Maybe you want another child
Piece scented baby. And you want it not because you are afraid of separation from children. You just counted how much about eggs you left, and fell into hysterics. What is it - that's it all break? The reproductive system served as much about you faithfully - in the sense, it prevented you to live normally and all the nerves were exhausted, and now everything, or now? What a nightmare! Not less, however, a nightmare - thoughts on how at that age it is normal to endure and give birth, without loss of the last crumbs of health. And how to bring up without the help of grandmothers - after all, they already need help.Output: Give advice in such matters - the case is bad. Therefore, we will not give them them, Be-Be-Ben. Although there is no one we give: it will take another year of fifteen, before you tell me - Peel, this horse died. That is, if you give birth to now, by the time of the collapse of your reproductive system you will have a ready-made teenager. We are so fat to hint that you have time to think.
Symptom 5. You will hit two hares
It is inevitable anyway. If you flew out on all sorts of losers from the top of your career - you will regret that a little time has given my family. If you dedicated yourself to my husband, children and house - you will regret the aimlessly lived years. He could have come up with a cure for cancer. Well, if you managed to take place and as a professional, and as a mother, a wife and hostess - you will regret that too little time paid for myself.
Output: Compete with yesterday's graduates is already late, this is a fact. These are not boys and girls, but natural hyenas - snack rails, Khokhach. Start a family life first, too, somehow strange: it works - do not touch. But now it's time to go. By God, in 20 years you would still not understand what a kayf of therapeutic massage. Not in bruises? But now you will understand. We guarantee.
Symptom 6. You will decide that mortally sick
The stain on the cheek is not a consequence of non-harmonious smoking, but an evil melanoma, of course. Pain in the chest is not because you sit too much for the computer, and because your fiery motor was worn out and stop tomorrow. Probably you will die from a heart attack. Or from stroke. What, in essence, for the better - because Alzheimer will visit you tomorrow. Or Parkinson, Adisson and Huntington, and many other interesting men. Actually, these are the only interesting men who from now on will visit you. Well, Kondrai is still here.Output: Go to the doctor. He will definitely find you in the analyzes any nastyness, from which they do not die and not even that they live well. But! After 20 years, this nastyness will certainly make himself felt, if you immediately not abandon smoking, alcohol and delicious food.
Table number five, fresh air, day mode. Scary recommendations, better immediately in the morgue. So, in fact, you will think. And you think about what you have ahead, it turns out, twenty years of normal life, and not half a year of hellish torment before the tragic, late death.
Symptom 7. You will try to think in the subjunctive tilt
And if you did not marry sausage, I could go to the Prince of Monaco. Although no - he is bald and ugly. But you could become a famous figure skater. This is if your mother would not be lazy to carry you on the rink to seven in the morning. Such data lost! And your talent of the designer railway bridges, on the root ruined by pregnancies? Where is he now, why do you design hotel bathrooms? Life lived, polymers won. Amen.
Output: You are definitely very smart, but your brain is a stupid fool. His, you see, absolutely no matter whether further generations of human young people remember you with a good word. It is important for him that you are right now and proud. He is all one - at least a bridge, at least a trained rat, even though Brad Pitt pastels is written as alive. Give him - and for yourself - at least a tiny reason to be proud of you. Both.
Symptom 8. You will try to find the meaning in life
And, of course, you will not find. And since it is not - it is better right away in the loop, which, asks, to suffer? Here earlier the meaning was to know the new one. For the first time fall in love. For the first time to pass on the perfectly complex exam. For the first time give birth. For the first time to realize that everything around the fool and do not be treated. And now for what neither take - everything has already been tested, meaningful, felt. Romantic moment is lost, what a pity.
Output: Psychologists are usually advised to start traveling, come up with some fascinating hobby, well, or the lover will finally get it - it will not be worse, because there is no place worse. But this is all lies. In the sense - about the fact that it will not be worse. You can frozen to death on Everest, break both legs from a ballet machine and become a victim of Alphonse. But this, how to say, is very hardly.
But get a lot of new impressions, suddenly turn the hobby into a new, fascinating profession and fall in love - at least in a new man, even re-in his own husband - easily. Moreover, it is usually this happens that the middle-aged crisis makes us a handle and a beautiful new life begins. And if it does not start at all, then you can start a living raccoon. Firstly, he has such cute handles. And secondly - now you're just a big girl and you can everything. All-everything is possible, and raccoon too. Hooray!