After the sensational video event, Shineid O'Connor, where she tells about her mental problems, Facebook user Boris Versea thought, why it rarely gives people recommendations on how to behave with loved ones when they, expressing colloquially, go crazy.
And I tried to do it myself. Here is his list of the most important things to do or not to do when a close man has a mental disorder.
Do not try to rationalize it
This is especially important if you have an innovation brain. To a person who goes crazy, do not need to pick the key in this state. If the pilot of the aircraft that has fallen into turbulence begins in a panic to press on all the buttons in a row, it has much more chances to crash than to get out of turbulence and put it.It is about the same thing you do, trying to independently help a person to unravel a chain that leads to madness. Most likely, you simply load it with new links: extra fault, false hypothesis. This is dangerous.
No matter how cruel it sounded, all this had to be done before a person was on the verge.
If you simplify, madness is a consequence of a launched chemical brain failure, you will not be able to turn the process back through this failure, calculate the generator of random numbers. To do this, we need years of very specific education and experience and a huge luck, which you definitely do not have if you have already been in such a situation.
For example, you do not need to try to appeal to a good: a person who goes crazy, perceives the availability of work, money, good apartment, children, the health of loved ones, good weather is not the way you. I would say you and you don't need to try to understand it, otherwise you will not be able to work with counterweight madness.
Cancel off
The only primary way to deal with madness is to drive it out of the body as an infection. At a minimum, you will be able to win time to regroup how maximum - save a person. How to do it? Ask man in detail to pronounce everything that happens in his head, without condemning him in anything, not surprising anything, ask, try to understand and say that you understand (even if you don't understand, because it doesn't matter now), not to express any Your attitude to this, except for adoption. Madness needs to be removed on the light of spoons, not leaving him the opportunity to accumulate in dark corners and get a division, for this you need to pronounce it.
If you need to be distracted, you need to give a pencil and notebook to man so that he wrote without stopping about everything that happens in his head. By the way, these notes later will help in working with a psychotherapist.
Follow yourself as Vitya, be careful as Tsoi
On the plane you put on an oxygen mask first on yourself, then on the child. In the hermetic situation, madness is the same. If you do not take care physically about yourself (food, sleep, hygiene), you will not be able to help close. If you allow yourself to be risked, then you will fall under the car, and with such scenaries you are incredible mad.Even a very sensitive person is always susceptible to the influence of the state of loved ones, follow yourself: I would say that a person who is engaged in supporting close, most likely the very therapy is needed.
Imitate life
People are generally pretty stupid, roughly as an average designer or a cat. Anyone, not only in a state of psychosis, is always stupid to their own body. Fortunately, the brain is part of the body. Imitation of life is like Fake It Till You Make It, only your task is not to help a person become better, but just survive.
Leave consciousness alone with you too long. It is necessary to accurately do what a person can still do from what was used to doing. Cook together dinner. Walk in the park with ice cream. View together the film. Do what unites you and does not require from your close special reflection, assess yourself, self-relation with someone and you. Go somewhere where a person has always been calm in a normal life. Your task is to keep the mind in the body, for this body you need to deceive - imitating a normal life.
Ground
It is important to do what makes the brain pay attention to the body and handle the signals coming from it, instead of what he really wants to do.Everything is suitable that distracts a person from his consciousness in favor of the body: sit in the bathroom, to have sex, go out to ride to other air, get driving radically, go to the massage. In general, physical pieces are very important. The separating consciousness should be given to understand that in general it is not in itself, but here there is still life and no one has canceled it.
Output from isolation, but avoid toxic communication
When the mind is separated from the body, the worst thing to be done is to provide him with comfortable conditions for this: to keep in four walls, satisfying his desire for complete isolation from the surrounding and its own life. Find people in your surroundings that are as far as possible to judgment and condemnation and can simply accept a person in this state, spend time with them. Sometimes to stop madness, quite a simple silent hug. Talk about what is happening with someone else.
This item has an important difficult moment: sometimes you yourself are a factor in the deterioration of the state (for example, if you are paired). No matter how hard it is, ask yourself if you can simply do your presence worse and think that you can do with it, but so as not to throw close.
To tolerate aggression
Probably, this is the hardest thing that may be in the world and nothing can be said about it. It is important to accept: it aggressants not your close, it is his illness. You can not dismissed the disease, but you definitely indulge the weak mind of a person who can still be saved if you do not hold your own reaction. Our girlfriend Lutheran Utkin somehow said that a true Christian does not accept sin, not a sinner. No need to be believers to carry out an analogy.At the same time, aggression is important to analyze, because aggression is also a transport for the withdrawal of madness. What comes out with aggression is possible, it turns out this way because it is important.
I have nowhere to add about suicidal thoughts, so I will add here: just perceive them by default, as a real, the most dangerous threat, even if a person never talked about it to illness and you can not imagine that your close to it is capable. Suicidal thoughts are a cry of help, do not think to ignore it.
Cut the brain
A man coming crazy is like a superheated computer. If your computer overheated, you turn off it so that it stops work and wait until he cools out, the same with a man. To do this, you can walk, make a person doing something, from which he is physically faster (but not to reduce). Your task to bring the body to the evening to smooth discharge so that the brain can cool and reboot in a dream. Therefore, it is wildly important to restore or create a sleep mode from zero (even if the person does not fall out, we do not say about the quality of life). To be seeded with alcohol and any means that change the consciousness cannot be in any case (if you have friends or relatives, prone to it, limit their influence).
Watch
A man who struggles with his own consciousness may not be able to simultaneously follow the body, and it is a big catch, because he does not have the strength to fight the disease. Find what a person can eat in this state and watch him a eat and drank.Avoid unnecessary innervation
For example, do not watch movies in which the hero goes crazy, absurdist performances, read Shakespeare, to be provided in further surreal situations. In ordinary life, you do not pay attention to these things (and even you are looking for them), but they are a huge amount around them.
And 2 most important points in a row.
Lead to a psychotherapist / psychiatrist right now
Not to a psychologist, priest, colleagues on illness, on the forum of sofa experts, coach for self-development, in the gym or to work.When you have a broken leg, you do not go to the beautician, you go straight to the surgeon.
How to choose the therapist?
It is necessary to clearly describe him the situation from the side (noble, your close is not able to do it adequately). The therapist must be confident in its forces and experience, or redirect you to another specialist.
Review a good therapist before the first session is hard, but it is possible after. Most importantly: the therapist will never tell a person what to do. This is a direct violation of ethics. If the therapist says - drinking Vintsy, drive up to the sea and do sports, please hit it novel by any heavy item. The therapist helps to develop actions tactics, but it can only be a mutual, based on the analysis of the process, and this does not occur in an hour. The therapist does not promise the result for 4 meetings and does not promise at all, because it can not physically.
If with the therapist uncomfortable, it is better to leave - you do not have time to get up. The ability to create the most confidential atmosphere is the main responsibility of the therapist. If you have concerns that the therapist may not follow the confidentiality of the patient - run from it.
The therapist will not climb somewhere without your consent, intentionally bringing pain - it will gently prepare you to this.
The therapist will not evaluate you and express your censure of your thoughts.
Drink tablets if they are prescribed
And in no case do not drink pills girlfriends, pills, about which someone wrote somewhere, drink tablets without weekly control of the specialist, violate the reception mode.
It is often difficult to decide on tablets, because they seem to be eaten madness. And there are many opinions about the fact that it is for life, and you can still warm up, and this is a conspiracy of pharmaceuticals, and in general you are not so weakhak so as not to cope without them. All this will be happening when you take a person to the state in which it in principle can think about something.
To not give up
To go crazy - it is physically very difficult and it does not continue forever: everything either end the hospital, or it will become easier - this is a pretty binary situation and both of these options are better than that uncertainty in which you are now. At the same time, go crazy exactly very easy if you stay alone with yourself. If you pulled out close to the world, in your life, most likely, there will never be anything, than you can proud more.
I would not know anything if we did not pass all this with my wife Aliya, which 6 years heroically lives with a mental disorder. As, however, most things that I know.
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