Family psychologist Pavel Zyggmantovich answers the main issue of life, the universe and all this: "Where did the real men be treated?"
Normal men translated as kind of agree? Many women agree. And even think that in former times everything was much more wise. And I remember the net "Moscow does not believe in tears", where Catherine (the heroine of the Alert) complains exactly the same. In 1981, by the way. In 1981! Cramolt thought is grazing - maybe it's not in the men?I dare to argue that the question itself is erroneous. The real men are not going anywhere (where to go to them, if it is not an accurate measure with an existing benchmark, but only an estimated judgment, which is fundamentally subjective?). The problem is not that something unusual happened to men.
The problem is that many women incorrectly assesses a potential narrowed.
How it looks in practice. A woman is focused on a small, extremely scant set of features that attract her attention. If a man gives this set, he likes. It does not produce - do not like (men, by the way, are mistaken exactly the same, but here "saves" less demanding to the elect).
This, by the way, is quite reasonable behavior - how else to allocate among your chosen one among the crowd? We look at a potential partner in different situations, correlate with a certain way that lives somewhere in my head, and we endure the verdict - it is suitable or not.
However, there are tricks - not always a man can give this set.
Temporary blindness
Here is an example. Two men are suitable to meet. One behaves easily and beautifully - to moderate the opposition, moderately careful, persistently persistently, sullenly. And the second says the nefple, Mumlit, can not support the conversation.
Which one will like it? The first, of course.
Which of them will be the best spouse? Big question.
The first is familiar perfectly, but does it mean that he will be a wonderful husband? No, does not mean. This means that he is well acquainted and only. Well, it may also mean that he had fifteen thousand such dating, this acquaintance - fifteen thousand the first and not over the mountains fifteen thousand second.
And the second man gets bad, because he has no experience. He got acquainted ten times and only once. Does this mean that the second man will be a bad husband? No, does not mean. This means that he has little experience in dating. Perhaps (perhaps!), It is this second man who can become a good spouse. But his woman - will not notice.
Another example. Say, party in honor of the birthday. The girl comes to his girlfriend, there are two guys. Outwardly more or less cute, but one clapped and sits quietly in the corner, and the second is the soul of the company. The first for the whole evening only once I tried to say something to this girl, and it came out the coryavo, the second one was reached by the view and did not go anyway. The question is which of them will be the best husband?
Again - no guarantees that the second will be the best husband. Moreover, there is no guarantee that the second is really such a tank. Maybe the whole thing is that he knew almost everyone in this company, and his opponent - did not know anyone, except the mistress of the evening. Therefore, the second was in sight, and the first was kept in the shade.
But many women will seem that the second is cool, and the first one is not. And they will not even notice the first. And then, when the second is cheerful, but, let's say, frivolous, they will complain that there are no normal men.
In fact, they are. Just some women do not notice them.
Chief Secret
Many people (not only women, but also men) do not know the main thing - the most significant factor of good acquaintance for the relationship is territorial proximity. If people work together or live nearby, or are engaged in photography courses, chances that they will meet and they will develop relationships, much more than in all other cases.
Why is that? Because during the joint stay on one territory there is time to look at each other. During this time, people find themselves in several different situations and is already better visible, who is worth it. There are much less situations that are described above.
Consequently, the choice is more wise. Therefore, I strongly recommend looking for not concrete men, but places where women and men together are engaged in any activity.
Summarize. All I want to say: Dear young, if you complain about the absence of men in your life, take a look - how and who you choose. And - if you can - let the chance of those men who once did not interest you.
Take a look at them - silence of men, difficulty acquaintance, the inability to entertain you with a secular conversation does not mean about what husband it will be. Many sensible men do not know how to care - affects the lack of experience and some timidity before the female refusal. But giving a chance to such a man, you can freely live happily with him.
And I have everything, thanks for your attention.