Where there is Zen teachers to our grandmothers and other elderly ladies of the Soviet hardening! Without exaggeration, this is the best educator in the world, and you can raise anything and anyone. Their words and cases are expanding our ideas about the world and stimulate us at sometimes unexpected feats ...
Experienced scout
In the minibus travels Bodraya Granny and granddaughter of 13-14 years. Grandma 20 minutes is trying to talk closed granddaughter. "Do you wear a cap?" - "Noshu-Voshu ..." the girl clearly thinks that the grandmother is already old as the world, lagging behind, talking about nothing with her. The old woman does not surrender and trying to grope the theme closer for the girl, I remembers the grandcheck a girlfriend Nataska ... But again there is a pause. And then the grandmother with the tone of the experienced scout, even and impassive voice, issues: - Do you do selfie? - Dr. Ah ... - The granddaughter clearly did not expect such knowledge. - Where did you learn it?! - And what to teach him, on all sides ... the fool is another. - Do you want to do with you? - offers granddaughter. "Well, come on," says the old woman is all the same everyday voice. - Right now in Instagram, let's sign up: "We are going with Granny in Mega!" - A girl is merrying, and immediately begins twitter. Granny remains only to listen. Hacked granddaughter!Fitness trainer
- Oh, a man, help the suitcase to remove! - "God's dandelion" shows on Baul size from her. With sin in half pulling out of the tape. - Oh, not mine, it seems! - Stuffing the suitcase back. - Oh, there is a bow, then mine! - catch up, I become staring. - A, not, I have a bow on another tied ... Won, I am going! - pointing to an even greater suitcase. The man does not stand next to: - Granny, I can take you to yourself a fitness coach!?
Good sorcerer
In one of the technical universities there was a computer class, where the laboratory worked with a cozy old age of 70 years. Usually it was just sitting in her corner and knitted. Somehow I sit, I am writing a program, and it does not work, even though you are crazy. Nervous. - What? Does not work? - I hear the voice of my grandmother behind your back. Since the cooler is not accustomed to routine, I had to answer, what's the matter. - And you declare this variable transfer from the procedure to the program and make it global ... - Granny Granny. I lost the gift of speech. The program still earned as the Swiss watch. Later, I learned that my grandmother laboratory candidate was some kind of sciences ...
Last argument
I went to my grandparents. As always, grooves, pie. When we started with my grandfather about politics, my grandmother listened a little, hesitated - and issued a unlimited summary: "And I tell you, the Americans are completely stupid! They won and the president is now non-Russian! " There was nothing to cover, we closed the topic with my grandfather ...Educational moment
We are waiting with a different elevator on the first floor of the university. Two senior professors are suitable behind. We skip them forward, then come in ourselves. One teacher is dying: "Thank you, the children, not often us, old people, go ahead ..." - "And do not say," the other ends her. - Brought up young people meet more and less often ... (pause.) Usually these bastards have to sweep the elbows! "
Eh, youth! ..
My advanced grandmother is interested that there is such an enthusiastically studying in the Internet. Honestly confess that on the topic "Point G." Anyway, I think it will not reach. "Where is the" HE "point? - Laughing grandmother. - Here the youth went, they don't know where they don't know where ... "and grandmother thoughtfully slyly scratches the fifth point ...Sex education
Once, when the familiar sex had a room, her grandmother woke up behind the wall. Probably, this grandmother was different, because she not only heard what was happening, but also learned how this was happening. The next morning she told his granddaughter that she had sex ... absolutely wrong! And told how it is necessary. It turns out that with the help of a complex system of three markers, one of which is under the girl, on the second partner performs an interrupted act, and the third should be watched ...
Cognitive lecture
Noted the session. The next morning my friend should go to a friend. I barely gets up, the head is square, the calm is over the mile ... enters the trolleybus. And opposite the grandmother with grandson, intelligent such. And the boy declares: "Grandma, uncle stinks!" He thinks: how does she answer such a statement tactfully? And the grandmother calmly summarizes: "Well, firstly, does not stink, but smells. And secondly, Uncle - a student, this is his natural smell. "
In the courtyard evil old woman
On the severity of the Ukrainian grandmothers. The five-year nephew came with his parents to visit her grandmother. In the courtyard two dogs, bark, the wicket is closed, the whole choir shout: "Bab-Len!" In the full sip, the dogs are laid even louder. It comes out of granny - and in the way to the gate pacifies the dogs: "Well, to stir up, and you are in the cheese!" The nephew frightened and quietly whispers: "Everything, silent, silent ..."What do you give?
And now about the caringness of the Ukrainian grandmothers. A teenager in a minibus listens to something heavylyometal so that even through his headphones heard to everyone. Shake in the beat with all body, says something. At some point in ecstasy scrolls: "Die-E-E-E !!!" The old woman bends next to him gently sympathy: "Which Toby Date, my breath?"
Grandmother Scully
Once, when I was small, my grandfather and I went to walk - and got lost because he decided to cut the way. Returned late. I was afraid that the granny will ask us, and envy our fence, I drove off all my feet. And she is an inquisitive voice of the researcher: "And what you did not take aliens?" Here I, yesterday, frightened even more ...Self-alignment strength
I'm talking from the words of the Father. It was only after the war. He lived, there was a lonely old woman in the Bashkir village. Once it was punished - the head splits, the bones of the lomit, the heat. There is nothing to do, you have to go to the next village, where I had a Sanchast. How long is it quickly, but you did you before Sanitary Parable. Enters the hut, and there the corrider is packed by the same disease. According to the corridor, the nurse walks, the mains in all inserts to accelerate the process of receiving patients. Got a thermometer and an old woman. I sat down-sat, I felt better, and I drank back home, the same ten kilometers. Nurse in the evening of one thermometer did not take place, but nothing they wrote off. Funny started in a year. Grandma again appeared in the Sacraft and began to demand a magic glass wand. They say, that old crashed - and now the health is completely rotated! Began the doctors to understand: it turns out that as soon as the grandmother will annorate - immediately the degrees of the armpit and in five minutes again healthy. In general, the doctors were consulted and decided: it helps - it is necessary to give out. Happy grandmother lived the rest of his days in full health!
Doctor herself
My great-grandmother lived all his life - and never went to doctors. When I began to ask her to ask what was secret, she said that in his youth once the field damaged his back - and went for help to the local Fershal. "So he discharged me? One head tablet! He had nothing more ... on, says, the girl, go and not sin! Well, I passed a little - and smelled ... So I since then and I understand, sho and I can work myself to work myself! " And indeed, since then until the death of death (that is, up to 87 years old), Baba Ksana coped with self-medication.
Tourism Foreva
The daughter and her husband went on a tour of Boldino. The group of excursors was going on the square, most people are young. The old woman came to the bus, tied up, tied, years old. The guide, smiling happily, met her, as an old familiar: "Hello, Raisa Ivanovna!" The excursion went beautifully, the old woman checked together with everyone, scored water from the holy source, and after dinner in the hotel cheerfully stated that "there would be a hundred hundred, it would be quite good"! On the questioned, this is what ... Next from her words. For several years ago, doctors said that I had a terrible disease, and live for a long time. And I am alone at all, I do not need anyone ... Well, so as not to suffer, I decided to end my life. And invented to rush down the ski jump! As I climbed there - I do not know ... And I rose, and the view from there! Miracle! Beautiful! I stand, I look at the city below, and I understand that I did not see anything in my city ... And suddenly I changed my mind. Descended down. It became for the native city to wander, to consider everything on museums, the Kremlin ... then traveled later in the monasteries neighboring, then more. Now almost all of Russia traveled. I know all the sightseeing bureays! And recently, the doctors said: "You have no illness, you cured, grandmother!" So, tourism is the best medicine!