It is said that the phenomenon of the Russian dacket is inseparable from the phenomenon of the Russian soul. Like, if you were born and grew up in Russia, the dacifications are sitting in your blood along with Kalinka-Malinka and Salat "Olivier".
In fact, the national question - as always, the question is controversial. But here's the fact that any summer house, in a sense, a mutant, and is very different from a sensible person, no doubt causes.Reasonable man uses urban housing for appointment
He lives there. The summer man believes that the apartment is such a transitional Nora between the cottages and the cottage. The apartment should store gardening inventory, so that in winter it is not cut by the deadly enemies of the dacket - bums. Nothing that the lawn mower occupies the entire balcony, and due to the shelter covered by the generator, it is impossible to get to the refrigerator. The main thing for the season everything will be whole and unharmed.
And during the period from March to May, the dacnik man turns an apartment in the Botanical Hell, placing pots with a nutritious shit and a tomato seedle everywhere where his intricate fantasy will be taught. For example, in the bath. It is not necessary to wash a dacket man: the future harvest of Parenic is much more important than some kind of hygiene there.
In general, with hygiene, a person's person is so-so
For example, what is a reasonable person doing with garbage? Right! He ruthlessly drags him on the garbage. There is no garbage for man-dacket. In the farm can be useful to all.
Empty plastic bottles, used food containers, which have failed packages and other rubbish are digging by a man man with a careman. Never ask the dacnik, what hell he keeps "this rusty pelvis and this drain pillow" - cater for yourself the enemy for life.
Want to get joking? Offer a gift box to throw out old sneakers. Or take and throw themselves. You are very lucky if you have time to escape. And we still don't say anything about tea and eggshell!
The city of the summer man is limited to the country's fence
But it is not necessary to think that the dacket suffers from this and eager to break out of his six hundred. On the contrary. Any thought that the weekend or, God forbid, vacation can be spent somewhere except for precious beds with a lag-garlic, leads a dacket to a sacred rage.Such an attachment of the summer house to his native land would be even touching if not a painful desire to initiate all humanity to initiate dacities. "Nature - Syo. Skash. Balca. Come "," so affectionately, gradually the dacket begins to involve a person intelligent into his satanic sect.
"What did you forget about this Cuba there? Is there such a pond with headstands there, like me in Chmrykh "? - This is usually the second stage. More aggressive.
In the second stage, the third one follows: "Yes, I know these your Turkey-Schuming! There are some idiots, they do not speak Russian! Neither to shout normally, neither sleep. Whether the case is Daacha. "
The food habits of a dacket person for a man of reasonable look at one endless attempt by suicide
After all, every Friday, a person acquires the venue of the ready-made small skewers, sausages and spickers of unknown origin and tons of cheap alcohol products. All this dacnik feeds itself, its households, their pets, as well as (indirectly) numerous midges and mosquitoes.
It is curious that in such a murderous gastronomic regime, the summer residents can exist decades. Where a person's reasonable person had already acquired a stomach ulcer and depression, a summer house, Rumyan and talking, which, in our opinion, is direct evidence of its genetic mutation.
METHOD OF MOVEMENT OF HUMAN HUMAN
It differs from human as well as a free drop from managed flight. Dachnik in a bus or train, and even more so, the dachnik behind the wheel - the creature is hysterical and unpredictable. As an alligator during Goh, he is a gust, then, on the contrary, too slowly slow. Moreover (which is especially dangerous) transitions from one state to another happen instantly.As the summer house is always burdened by kebabs, seedlings, inventory and household, his attention is focused exclusively on them. Environment (road signs, traffic lights, old women) at this moment the dacket is not interested.
Fortunately, a reasonable person is able to predict the migration of the summer house until the time of day, which still saved the Earth from the destruction.
In the natural habitat, the summer person calms down slightly
It dresses into torn shorts, Panama and T-shirt-alcoholic, takes a classic pose of fatally frightened ostrich and begins to move to one understandable route. The summer resident calls it "resting in nature", and God forbid to someone to doubt that it is a holiday, not torture.
However, this is really good to the gathering, because in the evening he, oddly enough, does not fall without legs to Malinnik, but vividly crawls to the mangalu, where it begins to fuse foods. Everything! The summer house calls it "with an appetite to dine outdoors," but we know that this is all the same inability to throw out surplus.
The worst starts with the ripening of the crop, when the summer house is given, but devours all that grew on the beds, bushes and trees. The man-reasonable from it would be smasted, and the gathering at least henna.
Any dachane has enemies
First, these are country bums, the purpose of which to wade into empty cottages. Secondly, these are cute harmless lifts, the battle with whom the dacnik leads for centuries. "And what are you krotiki?" "Yesterday Krotov topi-rope ...".Thirdly, neighbor's cats and dogs, whom neighbors will have specifically, so that they make their way to flowering flower beds and gadal there. In the fourth, neighborhood children, whom the neighbors give birth, of course, also specifically. Children from the pelleok are brought up by their neighbors so to interfere with the gift of screams and steal with a strawberry bed.
Fifth, the neighbors themselves. In the sixth, head of the country cooperative. In-seventh ...
In short, the list of human-man's enemies is infinite, and the methods of combating them are diverse. Starting from pouring crotics with water, ending with the institution of its own dogs and children in retaliation of neighbors. Summer life is an endless struggle.
Intellect of the Summer Man underwent inevitable metamorphoses
It is impossible to say that the dacket is stupid. Not at all. However, his knowledge is peculiar. For example, what does a person know about tomatoes? He knows that they are: pink, red, tasty, Uzbek, Cherry and in a salad.
The dacket man in detail will tell you than the form and size of the Altai silver preferably the shape and size of the raspberry viscous, and it will not be a story about adult films. The dacnik man knows everything about the device of greenhouses, autopolina and the cost of horsepower. The desired knowledge. But will everyone? Dachnik is sure that everyone.
Children of a summer man from birth doomed
I like it or not (but usually do not like) they will still use them - after all, there should be nothing to stand in the farm, even babies.
The smallest convenient to feed the crop "right from the bush". Those who older can be attracted to work alive chucks - let them not just run, but the raven is still overclocked. Teens are suitable for sowing, weeding, harvesting and its subsequent destruction. And adult children of the subsidence and free challenge at all.
"Here your parents in the sweat and blood are plowing, and you are cool," says the dacket man to his adult child at least once a day. Explain that you are not cool, but you work - it is impossible. Prove that the kilogram of cucumbers bought in a stall is three times cheaper than the same kilogram since the giving - unreal.
Therefore, the child in the evening doomed to the hated dacha and thinks that once he was given birth specially for her.