The desire to have offspring naturally for every female woman. Only about 10% of the weak floor representatives feel unpreparedness to motherhood, while men who do not want to have children at a young age make up more than half of the male population. Most of them are aware of the desire to be a father, just after seeing their child.
Men and women have different motivations to start offspring. Future mother presents in advance and dreams, how to lower the baby, and then nurse with him. She seeks to give love and tenderness of this small part of itself, which wears under heart. The same joy and lunizing come to men after the appearance of crumbs. And in the process of planning a child, the future father thinks more about how he will teach and raise a son or daughter, as will transmit their experience.Why doesn't husband want children
If the spouse does not want a child - this is not a critical problem. In most cases, a man can be convicted. However, it is not necessary to react to the reluctance of her husband to start children too painfully. A woman perceives the world more emotionally, it concerns the family sphere. But a man thinks rationally, weighing and thinking about his actions. Perhaps his words are not deprived of meaning and better to postpone the planning of pregnancy.
The reasons why the husband does not want a child, a lot. Consider the main of them. • He is not confident in relationships. Sometimes men can be disappointed in their choice of the second half. If family relationships were smashed, and love and understanding disappeared, the husband may doubt, if the woman is worthy to become the mother of his children. The child can not glue the relationship that they gave a serious crack. Therefore, before you start the baby, you must first sort out yourself and your desires. • He is afraid that the spouse will change for the worse. A man took a slender attractive girl in his wife, and suddenly after the wedding she turns into a neglected aunt in a stretched coat, and even the baby shouts forever. Most men in imagination is drawn exactly such a prospect. The fears of her husband are confirmed by the behavior of his wife even before the birth of the baby. She stops watching himself, becomes uninteresting and boring. To dispel these fears, a woman needs to take care of their appearance and at home - fashionably dress, doing physical culture, follow hair. • He jealines his spouse to the future kid. There is a category of men who do not want women's love and care to spread on someone except them. For such a husband, a child is a competitor who competes for the attention of women. The roots of this problem as a child's childhood. Perhaps he grew up in a large family and lasted maternal love. And maybe he is just an egoist and daffodil. In any case, the wife needs to constantly prove that for her he is the most beautiful and decent man, and in the future - also a wonderful father. • He is afraid of responsibility. Many modern men prefer to live for themselves and are afraid to lose freedom. The child requires considerable material costs, and the older it becomes, the more hassle brings parents. With the advent of the offspring, a man will have to work more and earn, family problems will only be added, carefree life to end. We'll have to limit yourself in holidays and meetings with friends. A woman needs to carefully analyze the worldview of her husband. If he is simply not yet arrived, then over time matches and will become ready and paternity. And if freedom is more expensive than a spouse and children, then, alas, it is not necessary to count on a full-fledged family with such a man. • He still does not face the legs. This is perhaps the most reasonable husband's argument that does not want to start children. A man understands that the child needs certain conditions for normal development. If at the moment the family's financial capabilities do not allow this, the spouse can ask a woman to wait until life get better. To such words, it is worth listening, and the husband is assessed for the responsible and sober attitude to life.
Husband does not want a child - what to do?
You can convince my husband to have a male with the help of female wisdom and patience. Here are some tips for psychologists for women: • Find out the real reason for the reluctance to have a child. Distrite your husband directly to determine what situation your case includes, and, based on this, follow the recommendations of psychologists. • More often go to friends, already having children, attend events related to children. Communication with kids may awaken father feelings in a man. • Try to start a pet first. Caring for his favorite pet, a husband to some extent will take on the role of a parent and realizes that it is not so terrible to take care of someone. • Establish family priorities correctly. Do not fill in thoughts and conversations about the child all your life. In the family, the woman should emphasize first of all for his interests, after that - for the interests of the spouse. And only in third place in this hierarchy is a small creature. Otherwise, harmonious family relationships are impossible. • Defeate your desires. The husband should see that since you decided to give birth, it means they are ready to save and abandon frills. For example, buying a new fur coat or excess pair boots will be inappropriate. • Do not show excessive sexual activity. The conception of the child should go naturally, and not as a result of daily bills to her husband. From the side it will look at at least weird. Do not forget that the baby is the fruit of love and voluntary intimacy.
Husband does not want children - a woman's mistake
Some want to become mothers so much that they make a bunch of serious mistakes and instead of a happy family receive a destroyed relationship. What should not be done, persuading the spouse to become a father?
• Pregnant in secret, deceiving husband.
Do not start the life of your child with deception. If the woman secretly ceases to be protected, and then put a man before the fact, he will feel himself deceived and offended. After all, such an important question as the planning of children should be solved together. • Scandaling, blackmailing and installing ultimatum.
With these methods, you only strengthen the wife of doubts about your relationship. The kid should be born descended for both parents.
• Distant, closes in yourself. Often women say hints, and then they are offended that men do not understand them. They put in an example of pregnant girlfriends or happy mommies, and in response to the indifference of her husband to such humble stories, they begin to blame them in the reluctance to start a child.
• To start the baby to save the relationship. If family bonds have become fragile and parting is nearing every day, the child not only does not glue the family, but will complicate the relationship even more. In the eyes of a man, such a woman behavior looks like blackmail.
• Talk about the offspring immediately after the wedding. Do not blame all the charms of family life at once. Let him get comforted with the idea that he is now a family man.
If the husband is not ready for the birth of a baby, psychologists advise not to wait for a quick result. The man needs time to change their views and desires. In no case do not reproach and do not blame a person in the reluctance to make children. Each adult man is a free person, and he has the right to his life choice.