Marriage is a permanent job in which many scrupuls need to be exercised. A pair of incorrect steps, and now the divorce is not far off. In a pair, both play an important role, but most of the family well-being is on the shoulders of a woman, so in this article we will tell about women's mistakes that are very often the cause of family destruction.
Rescue loved
For a not always understandable reason, very many women to madness likes to solve their problems for men - write a course for him, try to get rid of drunkenness, protect against a bad company, etc. That's just all this nobility helps to build not adult healthy relationships, but co-dependent. Remember, men are capable of solving their problems themselves, and if they do not, it means they do not see anything wrong in what is happening. Not satisfied with his lifestyle or behavior - tell me if he does not consider it necessary to change - it's just not your man. Do not take themselves with foggy hopes that sooner or later everything will work out - this will not happen, and your life will go to the cat under the tail.Lack of faith in her husband
Most of the ladies, being in the status of married, go to the unloved work with a small salary only because of the experience that her husband can dismiss from work or think about what he can go to another. Someone even directly declares his husbands. And few of the women thinks that men regard this as follows: "Dear, I do not believe in you." But here the other question is brewing - if you do not believe in a man who is next to you, then what have you forgotten next to him?
Another visual example, but in the household sphere. A woman asks for a man to do a hole with a wall, but that for various reasons can not start executing the request to be promptly. A little waiting, the wife defiantly grabs the drill and embarks on the case itself. The result is the same - a man sees in this action that a woman doubts his competence on this issue. And also, remember if you do something on your own once, you will have to do it all the time. Therefore, it is better not to run ahead of the locomotive and allow a man to make your affairs. And if something has jumped out of his head, it's just affectionately remind him of my request.
Women's role
No man wants to be next to a woman who constantly "cut it," talking about his discontent, read notations and teach life: "You have not said that", "This is not done so," "You do not keep them With his boss / friends / colleagues. " Never educate an adult man and all the more husband - you are not his mother, not a teacher, you are a wife, a beloved woman. If you have no discontent - just culturally ask to remake if he did something wrong, or do it yourself. For example, if a man has a badly spent an apartment - ask him to do it again, but do not put forward claims. Also do not hurry to distribute advice. If the husband decided to share with you something, this does not mean that he asks you for advice. Sometimes men need to be just silently listened to, supported, and did not try to poke in mistakes and indicated how to actually "correctly" act.Pregnancy for saving marriage
If the relationship was very boring, or something went wrong, do not think that the birth of a child will fix everything. This is a very terrible delusion. The appearance of the baby in this case can only aggravate the problem, because not all men and women are psychologically ready for the role of the parent. But the most terrible thing is that the child will grow in not the most favorable environment. Yes, in some cases, the appearance of crumbs at the first time smoothes sharp corners in relationships, but children grow, and problems return. Children are beautiful, but not as a tool for salvation of marriage.
Constant control
If you want to ruin your relationship with your loved ones, or in general to disperse with him, then just start controlling it - check where he and with whom, call him at least 10 days a day, spy behind him on the Internet - turn the "jealous wife" mode . Be sure it is one of the most correct ways to break the relationship.But if you are tuned to keep marriage, and you do not like the behavior of a man and causes suspicions - just tell him about it. It is not necessary to speak not in an ultimative form - just explain that you are unpleasant, which causes discomfort. Remember the wise truth: a smart woman is watching himself, and a stupid husband.
An attempt to get into the relationship between the beloved and his mom
For his man, a woman should always stay the role of his wife, so you should never try to divide your beloved with his mom. Moreover, never attempt to lead an open hostility with her: it is deliberately not to go to visit her, not to meet with it, ignore it, etc. Even if the husband holds regularly and complains of his parents - do not come to provocations and do not unite with him against his own mother, stay in the neutrality position.
Become an interference in communication between the child and a former husband
Families disintegrated differently - for some men, children from the past marriage are what can be easily forgotten, for other parting with tea a whole test. And if your former husband is just the last case, it is better not to interfere with his communication with children, so as not to live in constant conflicts and not spoil the children's psyche. And if you decide to marry a divorced man who seeks to communicate with their children - then, without any conditions, take what he has a "baggage" of the pastDo not give him to communicate with your friends
If a man was traveling with friends to fishing, if they went to the bath together and watched football, no need to deprive him of these pleasures now. Similarly, it is not necessary to test on the topic that he communicates with people who do not like you. He is an adult and he himself will figure out with whom to communicate, and with whom there is no. And if you really look into the eyes, you are unable to protect it from all the "bad" people, and if he wants to go left, then for this it is not necessary to go with friends to the bath or go fishing - find a woman at once And it is possible to use the case in other, more favorable circumstances that you do not comply.
Use sex as a measure of punishment
Again, we return to the theme of education - a woman should not bring up a man in general, and even more so apply such ridiculous measures of impact. If the discord happened - it needs to be solved by negotiation, but not to deny a man in proximity or other needs.Spend rest separately from each other
If you have a tradition to rest arcs from each other during holidays, spending them separately, it can negatively affect your relationship. Such things can be practicing from time to time, but lasting a separate vacation must no longer three days. In all other cases you need to relax together. A pleasant joint pastime will only strengthen the relationship, charges with positive emotions and will give a lot of unforgettable impressions.
Move her husband in the living room after the child appears
Evregular a man from a joint bed in general a bad idea, even under such a noble pretext, as "he needs to sleep, and then the child prevents sleeping." Making this way, you seem to unite with the baby against the spouse, and I throw it out of my team. That is why in the first year after the birth of a child, men often feel abandoned and unnecessary.There are cases when a man voluntarily inquires to sleep to another bedroom, but here you need to show a hardness of character and not to let it. You can offer alternative options, for example, to buy earplugs. And one more nuance - if a man himself offers to sleep separately, it says about his unwillingness to the role of the parent, so he voluntarily separated from you. And it is only for him to go to another bedroom, as the gap between you will only increase.
Throw yourself and your interests
Unlike men, women are typical when married to forget about themselves and take the role of a housewife. Why apply makeup, why follow yourself, why do you like your favorite hobbies and meet with girlfriends? After all, you need to cook dinner, to get into the house, stroke things and go to the store for products! This is a very big mistake. First, merging with her husband, you lose your personality, cease to be an interesting person, incl. And for your man. Secondly, very soon you will be bored with such a life, there will be nervousness and burgunding to the whole world. In a word - this scenario has no good ending, so it is better to stay myself, and after marriage just to correct your lifestyle.
Constantly reproach him for the provinity
It is not necessary to constantly remember a man some act perfect for them in the past, especially after he apologized. Even if this act was his betrayal - but you decided to accept and forgive him, it does not give you the right to constantly reproach a man. If you are not ready forgive and forget - then the relationship should not be renewed at all - in any way.See in sex duty
Lessoning love and marital debt is absolutely different concepts, and the latter has nothing to do with the lucky union. Feel free to reveal the initiative and inclined the man to Intim - every representative of the strong floor from time to time I want to be in the role of a seduced woman.
Become for your husband a competitor
The topic of competition in the family is also not the rarest case. Reasons for competing a lot: Personal Outlines, Career, Financial Successes and Much. Of course, it is a bit strange, but one clear exactly is a very bad sign. The family is a team where everyone acts together and in the interests of all participants and there can be no competition here.