Failure of the century: "How I configured the coffee maker"

For my birthday, I gave a lot of useful gifts. Here you and liter enema, and I do not remember strange alcohol from the overgrown, but I was told that he was very loved by elephants, and a box with medicines, on each of which a label with the inscription type "Just me, and your guts will not be brown" . In general, everything is indescribable perfectly.

Among other gifts was a huge box with a coffee machine. I was afraid to approach her for 4 days: she inspired me some irrational fear, like any incomprehensible, but I need to use the gift!

Assemble, turned on, set up. Said: Everything is ready, use.

They gave me instructions thick with war and peace. I read it and went to get acquainted with this robot verte. It happened two days ago.

Until now, this robot did not give me coffee! I do not know why. But I'll tell you what was.

Start with what he talks all the time. Well, that is, I write me messages on the display. And he does not like everything. And first of all I myself. I poke your finger into the right button, he writes me: "Wait." I wait. Pass minutes. I wait. I'm waiting for Eduard Asadov! "I can wait you very much for a long time and right or right ...". I am waiting, and Werker is booming with intestines. I fused, and writes: "Choose your coffee." I choose "Superfrequency Taste, 2 cups." Again writes "Wait" and boils to the intestines. I wait. "... I can not sleep at night. Year, and two, and all my life probably. "

Burned and writes: "I recommend to reduce the amount of coffee!"

I politely tell him: "Thank you for the care, baby, but I want so much coffee! Give me him, give! "

Werker muttered a little more and wrote: "Too fine grinding. Adjust the coffee grinder. "

To know more, where it is necessary to regulate there. I am getting a coffee war and the world, and I find the "Coffee grinder adjustment" on 876. Adjusted. Smid button.

Waiter writes: "Fill water!"

Lord. Okay. Filled.

And notice, I don't even ask where you are all the previous water. I already ask you to ask you about something. But since you drank all her - it was probably with a hangover. Filled more water. Again I ask for coffee. I ask the right voice !!!! Werker thinks, and then writes: "Rinse a cup!"

Here I got nerves. And I screamed: And why didn't you like the cup, Gaddy ???? I am her soap !!! Sponge! With Fairy! From all sides! She is clean, Mom swear! Give me coffee, please !!!

"Rinse a cup!"

. I went to wash a cup. At the same time, it was undressed and washed myself. All entirely. Because he suspected that now I will still make it make it. Put on clean panties. Once again I washed a cup. Then he guessed that the "rinse a cup" is probably some kind of function in the car, and it is necessary to find it.

I got war and peace. At the 458 page discovered the rinsing function of the cup. Pressed. Werker drove and gave me a portion of boiling water in three times washed a cup. And again "Choose your coffee."

I didn't unwind him, chose "Cauccino". There is one large button with a similar inscription. And do not choose anything and make a certificate from the cardiologist. Press the button. He writes "a lot of foam, little coffee, a lot of coffee is little foam." I buried: Yes, even with foam, even though even with the mounting, even without foam, but I pour me, please, at least something, Lyingar !!!

Werker drove and wrote: "Rinse a cup!"

Cattle. I rinsed five times a cup, and myself washed, and my panties are clean, new and with tag: I ran out for a special occasion and nights of passion and love, but you, bitch, did not leave me a choice! What else do you need, rubbish?!

Werker drove, wrote: "Turning off" and went out.

I stand in in the middle of the kitchen in some shorts, with a sterile cup and nervous tick. Boil water in the kettle. I will drink tea. If only the kettle it will be allowed to me.