Sithole kudokotela wezengqondo womndeni uPavel Zygmantovich Isihloko esizokusindisa imali eningi, isikhathi nezinzwa, uma wake wacabanga ngemibuzo: "Ngiye ngacabanga yini ngowesifazane? Ngabe isikhathi sokuhlakulela owesifazane weqiniso ngokwakhe ?! "
Umfundi weza: "Bengifuna ukubuza noma yiluphi ulwazi (incwadi, indawo, i-athikili) mayelana nokuthuthukiswa kowesifazane wangempela."O, yeka umbuzo ojwayelekile. Hlala ubuza ukutshela ukuthi ungaba kanjani umfazi wangempela noma indoda yangempela. Babekwazi ukubuza okungenakwenzeka ...
Yilokhu engikubhalele ukuphendula: "Ngizojabula ukuncoma - gijima kuzo zonke izincwadi, amasayithi nezindatshana ezikutshela ukuthi ungahlakulela kanjani umfazi wangempela."
Futhi kunezizathu ezinkulu zempendulo enjalo.
I-Gegemon, Gegemon
Isazi sezenhlalo sase-Australia Revin Connell sesokuqala ngandlela thile umqondo othokozisayo - ubudoda be-hegemonic (eng. Hegemonic masculity). Lokhu kufana kakhulu futhi kwamukelwe iningi lendoda yangempela okufanele kube yindoda engokoqobo (ngezengqondo, ngendlela, igama elithi "iqhaza lobulili" livame ukusetshenziswa, kepha le mininingwane).
Igama elithi "hegeconic femnost" angizange ngihlangane ezincwadini ezikhuluma isiRussia, kodwa ngikhuluma ngesiNgisi - igama elinjalo lisazokwenzeka, kuyaqabukela.
Ekhuluma ngobudoda obulula, obunezinkinga kuyinto "ndoda yangempela." Ngokufanelekile - ubani ohambelana nalesi sithombe, esilingana nokuqina kwe-reegemon, "lowo ndoda yangempela."
Futhi ubani ofanela "ojwayelekile futhi wamukelwe iningi" kulokho owesifazane ofanele okufanele abe yikho, lezo, lokho, "abesifazane bangempela".
Futhi kuvela ukuthi "ukuthuthukisa umfazi wangempela" kulula kakhulu. Kufanele senze izinyathelo ezimbili kuphela:
- Qonda ukuthi i- "Hegemocicicism" ibukeka kanjani (noma ubudoda - kulabo abafuna ukuba yindoda yangempela).
- Lilinganise ngokuphelele kule phrezentheshini.
I-Voila, le nto isesikhungweni, wonke umuntu wenelisekile, wonke umuntu uyajabula, "abesifazane bamemeza baphonswa phezulu emoyeni."
Futhi konke kuzolunga, kepha kunenkinga ...
Awukwazi ukusunduza enqoleni eyodwa ...
Isici esiyinhloko salezi zinhlosi ukuthi zingqubuzana ngokuyisisekelo. Ngigcizelela - ngokuyisisekelo.
Isibonelo, ku-hemoc masculity, kuyadingeka ukuba ube nempilo, njengenkunzi, kepha kuphela ababuthakathaka baya kodokotela. Noma lapha - Amadoda kufanele abe nabangane bangempela, kepha indoda akufanele ibe ngeFrank. Kuyacaca ukuthi lezi yizidingo ezikhethekile.
Ingxenyekazi yesintu yesintu inokuqamekela okufanayo - ngokwesibonelo, kukhona i-HouseWee Yezeming Yommanga Wezemingcele (Syndrome Yekhaya). Owesifazane ubonakala ehleli ekhaya futhi akasebenzi, okusho ukuthi aphumule, kodwa eqinisweni - kusebenza kakhulu futhi akutholi ukuqashelwa nokubonga ngakho (ngemuva kwakho konke.
Ngikucela ukuthi ukhokhe ukunakwa okusondele kakhulu - ubudoda be-hegemonic / feminost yizifanekiso eziphikisanayo ngaphakathi.
Kungani kunjalo? Ngoba zonke izindima zobulili (ngisebenzisa igama lezengqondo, yize lisondele kimi), okungukuthi, izinkambiso zenhlalo, "eziqukethe imiyalo kanye nokuvinjwa ukuthi yini okudingeka uzizwe futhi yenze."
Njenganoma yimiphi imiyalelo nemibhalo, lokhu futhi kujwayelekile futhi kuqinile - ngenkathi impilo yangempela iqondile futhi ipulasitiki kakhulu.
Lokhu kusho ukuthi umuntu akakwazi ukuxhumana ngokuphelele nezindima zobulili. Umuntu angahambelana ngokuphelele nobudoda obukhaliphile. Umuntu wesifazane angahambelana ngokuphelele nobufazi besifazane.
Kalula nje, indoda ayikwazi ukuba "indoda yangempela" ngokuphelele. Konke okufanayo, kukhona okuzokwenza kungabi kwangempela impela. Futhi - nowesifazane.
Lokhu kubizwa ngokuthi izingxabano zobulili (ukungqubuzana kwendima yobulili) - isimo sokuhlangana ngokwengqondo esivela ezimweni lapho izindima zobulili zinomthelela omubi kumuntu nendawo yakhe.
Ngenxa yalokhu kungqubuzana, abantu baqala ukufuna "noma yiluphi ulwazi (incwadi, indawo, i-athikili) mayelana nokuthuthukiswa kowesifazane wangempela." Ngandlela-thile kuxazululwe ukungqubuzana bese ususa umuzwa wokungakhululeki kwangaphakathi.
Vele, yi-Utopia. Ukuphela kwendlela yokususa le ngxabano akuyona ukulandela i-hegemon masculs nezinye izindima zobulili.
Usuvele wangempela / wangempela
Usevele uyindoda nowesifazane uqobo. Isibonelo, kuma-seminar wakho wesilisa (okungukuthi, imicimbi yeqembu labesilisa), angisho ukuthi indoda yangempela kufanele ibe kanjani. Ngithi - "Yilowo nalowo kini ungumuntu futhi nalokhu kubalulekile; Sonke (futhi kufanele senziwe!) Ukuthuthukisa amakhono athile nekhwalithi, kepha senza ukuthuthukisa ikhwalithi yempilo, hhayi ukungena kunoma yiziphi izifanekiso. "
Ukube benginemihlangano yowesifazane, bengizosho into efanayo.
Ngizoyisho futhi lapha - zintokazi ezithandekayo, usuvele ungowesifazane. Ephakeme, ephansi, egcwele, emnyama, iziketi nama-jean, ama-hairpin kanye nama-sneaker, ku-podium nasesitokisini sakusihlalo Futhi awudingi 'ukuthuthukisa owesifazane weqiniso.' Usuvele wangempela.
Ungakwazi (futhi ulusizo!) Ukuthuthukisa amakhono nezimfanelo ezahlukahlukene, kepha awunasidingo sokuthuthukisa owesifazane wangempela ngokwakho. Usuvele uqinisile.
Futhi nginakho konke, ngiyabonga ngokunaka kwakho.