I-Caming Out: INDLELA ENGAKWAZI UKUZE BAKUFANELE UMMALI OKUFANELEKILE

UJulia Xiant - Umama osemusha noDowra, ombhalo wabo ngokukhathala okungama-tactile (wathinteka ngokuphelele) sesishicilelwe okokugcina, futhi wabhekana nezinkulungwane zokwabelana ngezikhala. Futhi le ndatshana imayelana nokuthi amantombazane anamuhla azishayela kanjani e-angle, ezama ukuba omama abaphelele. Futhi kungani kulimaza kakhulu ukuzama ukuba njalo. Akukho okuhle. Khohlwa leli gama.

Ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa, mina, kunjalo, ngikholelwa ukuthi konke kuzobe kungaba kimi njengasebungwini ekubhalweni kwengane okwemvelo nomzali. Ukuzalwa kuzoba lula, kusheshe, "kube yikhulu". Hlezela ngokushesha ingane esifubeni futhi uzolala iminyaka emibili emukeni. Futhi yebo, ngesikolo ngasinye - namabele, futhi akukho mapififa. Futhi sizohamba esigangeni ngesigamu sosuku, futhi empeleni esikhaleni! ukwelula ... futhi lapho kusekuphele isikhathi eside kulwa amahora amaningi nothango. Bobabili bakhala nobuhlungu. Ukuzalwa kwaguquke kube nzima, hhayi ngeze ngesiNgisi, ukubeletha kubizwa ngokuthi "umsebenzi" - umsebenzi. Futhi lapho ingane yami izalwa kahle, empeleni yayimnandi "ilengiswa" esifubeni sakhe. Yimina nje, noma kunalokho, lesi sifuba sami sasingakulungele ukungobisi nzima, futhi kusihlwa kosuku lokuqala ngangibhonga ngenxa yezinhlungu. Ngemuva kwalokho kwalandela inyanga yonke yokusungulwa kokuncelisa ibele nokuningi, izinyembezi eziningi namazinyo angcwele ngesikhathi sokondla.

Kudlule amasonto amahlanu, ukondla kwaba yinjabulo kanye nokusondelana okukhethekile, kepha kwakungelula kithi. Angikaze ngidikibale ngoba benginolwazi futhi ngikholwa ngokungahambisani nathi futhi ngisekela imvelo.

Futhi mangaki omama ababengenayo omunye? ..

Ngosuku lokuqala lwempilo yendodana yami, ngehora lesithathu ekuseni alwanga ukukhathala okungokwemvelo futhi kwaphuma ekhoneni elide lomuntu onikezwe ingono. Usayizi we- "12 m +", into enkulu enjoloba, ehambisana nalo emlonyeni wami engazange ayeke umntwana ofiphele ukuba awe. Kepha wamunca nje futhi wagcina walala. Futhi thina, singasindi futhi sibubula kancane ukusola.

Ngemuva kwalokho sasifundisa ezimweni ezinjalo ukuthi zinikeze ukuncela umunwe wakho ukuze singaphanga ukuthathwa, nezinkinga zethu ngokuncelisa ibele kwakubalulekile. Kepha .. Ukuthathwa sekuthuthukile, ubunzima bokudla kwabonwa. Izinkinga zokulala ziphakanyiswe njenge-snowball.

Ezinyangeni ezine, ngaphinde ngazama ukunika ingono (kakade ngosayizi, kunjalo) ukuze ngilale, futhi indodana yami yaqala ukulala, ngokushesha futhi kalula. Futhi ulale isikhathi eside. Sabonana nathi futhi sanquma ukuthi izinzwa zami nezinyembezi zami zibiza kakhulu kithi, futhi mabancela emaphusheni, kodwa sizophila ngaphandle kwalezi zinhlahlansi ezingapheli.

Sasimelene nothuli !!! Ngubani onika ingono - avele asebenze! Yebo, asikaze! ... Impela kuze kube ubusuku bokuqala. Lokho ebesikuhlekisayo. Ngathi - sasilele kakhulu ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa. Oh Yebo, futhi, kunjalo, iphupho elihlanganyelwe yile nhliziyo yegolide yokuba ngumzali wemvelo. Cha, ngisacabanga ukuthi kumnandi kakhulu ukulala ndawonye. Kepha asizange sisebenze. Ezinyangeni ezimbili zokuqala angikwazanga ukudla, zilele eceleni kwami. Ukuthwebula akuphumelelanga eZwini nhlobo, ngangilinyazwa kabi, indodana yami yakhungatheka futhi yathukuthela. UDed uhleli, emcameni, bese ushintshwa ngobumnene.

Nami bengingakwazi ukulala isikhathi esingaphezu kwehora nengane ngaphansi kohlangothi - konke okuchotshoziwe, ngavuka ngavuka ngivuke nendodana yami.

Ngaphezu kwalokho, bengine-autotid ye-postpartum autotid (lesi yinkinga ye-thyroid), futhi enye yezimpawu zakhe ukuqwasha, izinkinga ngokulala nokulala okuzwela kakhulu. Yebo, ubuqonda, yebo? ....

Inyanga yokuqala yeNdodana yalala ngempela phakathi kwethu noma embhedeni wami we-bock. Kepha sathuthela ebanga elikhulu kakhulu ukuze singamniki uNkulunkulu ukungakhathazeki futhi angavuki. Kwathi lapho eyeka ukulala ntambama emugqeni futhi anginawo amandla okusokisa ngaye (futhi ngangisenama-boob ngaleso sikhathi, ngibe nama-boobs ngaleso sikhathi, ngibe nama-boobs ngaleso sikhathi, waqala ukulala phezu kwami ​​phezulu, esiswini kwa isisu.

Ngafunda, ngalala, tupil kuFaisbook, futhi walala - konke kwakukuhle. Ebusuku, waqala ukulala ngokuzumayo eqhweni lakhe ngohlangothi lokudutshulwa olunamathele esandleni sami embhedeni. Kumasentimitha angamashumi amahlanu ukusuka kimi, kodwa nokwehlukana. Futhi ngaqala ukulala ebusuku, okungenani ngandlela thile. Ezinyangeni ezine, wayelele eCrib nantambama. Futhi walala lapho kungcono kakhulu futhi isikhathi eside, ebumnyameni nangomsindo nangomsindo omhlophe. Futhi benginenkululeko, eyedwa, isikhathi.

Ngakho-ke senziwe ngokulala ngokuhlanganyela, ama-Ala kanye noCheers. Kahle, ngama-slings. Ngigqoke ngenjabulo ezintathu nengxenye noma amakhilogremu amane wenjabulo ngenyanga yokuqala esikhaleni. Kanye ngeviki. Lapho-ke iNdodana yaqala ukukala wonke amakhilogremu ayisithupha, futhi ngavele ngathola i-tyroiding yami ngobuthakathaka bayo, ukuxhawulana izandla, ukubhoboza okuhlanyayo nesisu esibuhlungu.

Futhi, ingane kabi kayithandi ukufiphala, ngokushesha yaqala ukukhala futhi yaphuka, futhi mina - ngijuluka. Kwesinye isikhathi kulimaza igwegwe ukuze ngokushesha athule emgwaqweni, futhi kwesinye isikhathi ahlala ekhaya. Ukuhlanza ngokuzumayo kwaba yi-sling ngezindandatho. Ngokushesha, okulula, okulula. Kepha-ke ... ayisishiyagalombili hhayi ukuhlala amakhilogremu esihlahleni, ehlombe elilodwa, kude kunasesitolo?

Futhi ama-SCRY, engiwakhethile ngenkuthalo futhi athengwa kakhulu ekukhulelweni ... amanga, amahle. Nokho, muva nje, ngaqala ukubathatha futhi ngifunde ukudonsa inundu - lesi sifo sabuya, ingane yakhula yakhulisa. Kepha abasemuva basesikhethiwe kwethu kuma-95% amacala. Ubaba ubagqoke ngentokozo.

Awucabangi, angikhonondi. Noma engicabanga ukuthi umama wami wehlulekile. Cha, ngiyazi ngokuqinisekile ukuthi ngingumama omkhulu eNdodaneni yami. Uyingane enhle, ezolile futhi engakhululeki ngokuphelele.

Futhi naphezu kokuphambene - ngiyajabula ukuthi konke kwenzeka kimi. Ukuze isifo sezingane, esinesihloko esithi "Ukufuna Ukuphelela" kwahlala esikhathini esidlule.

Sonke sikwenza ukukhetha kwethu, okungcono kakhulu kuzo zonke izimo ezithile.

Owesifazane othile uzokhetha ukulinda ukuzalwa kwengane kwaba onqobayo, kanti omunye - "banikela" kodokotela emavikini angama-42, ngoba ubungozi bakhe bungathathi hlangothi. Bobabili bangathanda inhlanhla hhayi. Okwesithathu kuzokwenza iKhayareya ehleliwe emavikini angama-38, ngoba unesifo sikashukela nokubuka kuqala kwe-pelvic. Okwesine okufanayo kuzobe selindela ukuqala kwemvelo kokuzalwa kwengane futhi kukhuleke.

Okwesihlanu kuzovuma ukungeniswa kosuku olulinganisiwe lokuzalwa, "ukuze singabekezeleli," kanye nesithupha - esigabeni sesiphambano seCesarean, ngoba "i-ultrasound ikhombise isiqalekiso." Balalela kwakungeyena umuntu ozonikeza imininingwane ephelele, abonise imiphumela yocwaningo, aqabule futhi asiza ukuba athathe isinqumo sawo. Babengenakho ukukhetha okungcono kunokuvumelana nesiphakamiso sodokotela. Hhayi nje.

Omunye unquma ukubeletha ekhaya naseSolo, futhi othile uzizwa ephephile esibhedlela somama, ezungezwe yisixuku sochwepheshe. Ubungozi bokuqala bube "ukukhethwa kwemvelo", owesibili - isisulu sokuhlaselwa kwe-obstetric. Nokho, bobabili, kunamathuba amahle kakhulu futhi ngokwemvelo abelethe ngokwemvelo.

Umama oyedwa uzothenga i-stroller ethule, enye ayikho ngaphansi kokuncibilika. Okwesithathu kuzothenga i-kenguushku ngokuvamile - naye wafunda lokho ukugqoka ingane kuye kusiza kakhulu ekukhuleni kwakhe! Mayelana nje ne-ergonomic egqoke lapho kwakungekho zwi futhi empeleni akazi ukuthi kwenzekani ngenye indlela. Ucabanga ukuthi yini ngempela umuntu uthwala ingane e-khumbuziso ngokuqondile, ekwaziswa ngomonakalo ongaba khona enganeni kangaka? .. Ingane kabani ezovela esibhedlela somama vele ine-pacifier futhi ayihlakaze nayo iminyaka emibili, ngokufana ngokuphelele futhi ngaphandle kokumunca. isifuba. Futhi umama womunye ngeke amnikeze i-pacifier, kepha ngeke iphumelele ukuncelisa ibele. Ngemuva kwakho konke, kwenzeka.

Owesifazane othile uzobe lesikhumba esinqumweni sokuqala ngoLwesine, ekhuthaza umyeni wakhe ngenxa yale nkomba, kanti okunye kuhlala ezweni lapho ungasebenza khona izinyanga ezine nje kuphela ngemuva kokuzalwa kwengane. Futhi uma engumama ongayedwa? Ingane yakhe izoya ngokuphepha enkulisa ngokuphepha, ngoba idinga ukusebenza, futhi kudingeka asebenze, futhi abagogo basebancane futhi bona basebenza, futhi akunakwenzeka ukulahlekelwa umsebenzi. Umndeni wowesifazane oyedwa uzobe uqonda futhi uxhase, ulungele ulwazi olusha futhi uvulekele izingxoxo. Unina uzofika, aphume, apheke futhi athathe ndodakazi njengoba injalo. Umama nozala umkhwekazi bazodambisa ubuchopho bakhe bonke ngalokho okungasivumeli uswidi nenyama, akuluma futhi akukubi esihlalweni sabakhubazekile. Futhi uma owesifazane edinga ukushesha ukusebenza noma, uNkulunkulu wenqabe, uye esibhedlela, futhi ukuphela kwendlela yokukhetha kwakhe ephaketheni yengane? .. Ngamunye wethu angaba nezizathu zawo zokukhetha kwethu ukuthi othile angabonakala engalungile.

Ukugula kwakho, ngokomzimba nangokomoya. Okuzungezile, okuqinile hhayi ukungaqondi. Ukuntuleka kwemininingwane. Isimo sezepolitiki ezweni. Ukuntuleka kosizo. Ezinye izingane zidinga ukunakwa nokunakekelwa. Ukufa kwabathandekayo. Izinkinga zengqondo.

Ukuhlola nokusola omunye umuntu wesifazane ohlangothini - uqinisekile ukuthi uyasazi sonke isimo? ..

Ungulo wonke umama - wenza okungcono kakhulu kuye nengane yakhe, ekwazi ngalo mzuzu. Akabi ngumama omubi kakhulu ngoba nje wakhetha okunye, hhayi lokho obekungabe ekhetha umama "ofanele".

Eminyakeni emibili kamuva, eminyakeni eyishumi, nenye ingane, ngisho nomyeni wakhe, angakhetha okuthile okuhluke ngokuphelele. Kepha ngaleso sikhathi wenza into enhle kakhulu. Engakukwazi.

Wena, ngakho-ke wena, yebo, yebo, wena! Wena, mama walesi yingane! Wenza kahle! Ungumama omuhle ngoba awumshayi, awukunikeli ubufebe, ungalila indlala, futhi wagqoka ngisho nesimo sezulu sakho. Uyamthanda kakhulu, mnakekele futhi wenze okuphezulu ongakwenza, ngenhlala-kahle yakhe, impilo nenjabulo, kanjalo? Konke! Kwanele. Ungumama omuhle! Woza izinto zokubala. Awusoze waba umama ofanele, kepha ngeshwa kulula uma ungayeki ukucashile. Unjengawe. Futhi ingane yakho ikukhethile, weza kuwe. Uyakwazi okuthandayo futhi akuthandayo ngqo. Ukuthi - kanye naye kanye naye.

Ukuba nguwe yisifundo esibaluleke kakhulu ongamfundisa ingane. Musa ukugqoka imaski, ungazami. "

Kuyiqiniso, lokhu akusho ukuthi udinga ukuhlala kusofa, ukusola ugwayi futhi uphendule zonke izimangalo: "Yebo, yebo ngiyingulube!". Hhayi. Thuthukisa, funda, ulwele njalo ukuzithuthukisa wena nomhlaba wonke nxazonke - nalokhu futhi ingane izofunda kuwe. Kepha akudingeki uziqhathanise nabanye. Qhathanisa nawe eyedlule. Uyazi namhlanje ngamagama amathathu ngesiNgisi kunoMsombuluko odlule? Isigaba! Udle uswidi owodwa kancane? Super! Ngabe awukwazi ukungena engxoxweni yozakwethu osuselwa kuzakwabo? Iqhawe! Futhi uma - wakwazi ukubeletha ngemuva kweCesarean? Sondla isifuba sengane yesibili, yize ngokuqala "kwakungekho ubisi"? Ngifunde ukuthi ngingakwazi yini ukutatazela futhi ungashiyi ezinganeni? Wow! .. Futhi nje kanjalo. Futhi izingane, lezi zimoto ezincane zekhophi, zizofunda kithi. Kufaka nenjabulo nokwamukelwa. Kanye nokuphishekela ubuhle bomunye umuntu futhi abakaze bajabule.