Isazi sezengqondo u-Arthur Aron sifakazele ukuthi "ukuchitha isikhathi esithe xaxa ndawonye," njengoba iningi lezazi zezengqondo ziluleka, cishe zingenamsebenzi. Esikhundleni salokho, wathola enye indlela, eguqukayo futhi engenazinkinga. Sizokhuluma ngakho manje.
U-Arthur Aron, udokotela wezengqondo waseMelika, waziwa hhayi kuphela imibuzo engama-36 kuphela, ngosizo ongawathanda ngalo nomuntu ongamaziyo futhi uthandane nawe. Lo sosayensi, uhlola into engokwengqondo yothando. Isipiliyoni mayelana "nokuwa othandweni ngemibuzo engama-36" samiswa eminyakeni engamashumi amabili edlule futhi sisewumcabango omangalisayo. Kepha othandweni, ekugcineni, leli cala lilula, zibuza ngempela ukuthi kungenzeka kanjani ukulondolozwa umuzwa, ukuletha amashumi eminyaka okuhlala eminyaka, ukugeza, izingane, izilwane, izinkinga nezifo.Ubuciko Arona futhi lo mbuzo unempendulo ethakazelisa kakhulu, ngokusobala okusobala ngokwethembeka.
Ukunwebeka Ubuntu: Isimo esiyinhloko
I-Aonon inamathela emcabangweni wokwanda okungapheli komuntu. Lokhu kusho ukuthi ubuntu bethu bufuna ukwanda ngosayizi ngaso sonke isikhathi, bamukele ulwazi olusha, okuvelayo kanye nokuhlolwa. Uhlobo lwe- "Cadavr, ngokungagculisekile ngokwengqondo." Futhi indlela enhle yokukhulisa umuntu iba yinoveli noma uthando. Ubuntu buphelelwe yisikhathi somlingani - iphunga elisha, imizwa emisha, ulwazi olusha, abangane kanye nezihlobo.
Futhi lokhu kunjalo, inqubo evumelana ngayo, ubuntu bomlingani buye banweba. Lapha, ngendlela, esinye sezizathu sokuthi kungani ukwahlukana kubhekene nobunzima obukhulu - esikhundleni sokwandisa ubuntu kunokwehliswa, ukucindezela, lokhu kuyinqubo enzima kakhulu ye-psyche.
Umbono ofanayo uchaza ukwehla ekwanelisekeni kozakwethu ngobudlelwano obude. Isikhathi sokuqala esimangalisayo sokunwetshwa, lapho abantu behlangana ndawonye kuze kuse, bahlukaniswe ngamakhono, izimfihlo kanye nogwayi we-porcoital, sekudlule izinyanga eziyisithupha kuya eminyakeni emibili). Futhi-ke lo mbhangqwana uyazi konke ngomunye nomunye, futhi ukwanda kuyeka.
Kwezinye izimo, kuyasiza ukuqala izingane - lokhu kufaka futhi ukunwetshwa kokwazi. Izingane zikhula ngaso sonke isikhathi, ngaso sonke isikhathi ziguquka, zivulele umhlaba - futhi sikwenza nazo. Kepha ngobuningi bamabhangqa wokuncoma okuhlangene ngokuphelele, izingane zakwabo azikwanele.
Ukuhlolwa komuntu
Konke kubukeka kanjalo njengobufakazi obuvela ebufakazini bukaputeni, kepha akunjalo. U-Aron nozakwabo basebenzise izivivinyo eziningana ezithakazelisa kakhulu eziphathelene nobudlelwano besikhathi eside. Wathatha imibhangqwana eneminyaka engu-53 ubudala futhi waqiniseka amasonto ayishumi ukulandela imiyalo yakhe, echitha amahora akhe nesigamu ngesonto emakilasini athile.Okwesithathu kwale mibhangqwana kwadingeka ukuthi kukhethe iholide elisebenzayo, isikhathi esisha sokuzilibazisa: i-skis, ukuhamba ngezinyawo, ukudansa, amakhonsathi. Iqembu lesibili bekufanele libhekane "nezinto ezimnandi", kepha izinto ezivuselelekile: i-cinema, izindawo zokudlela, hamba ukuvakashela abangane. Iqembu lesithathu kwakuwukulawulwa futhi akwenzanga lutho.
Kwavela ukuthi izinga lokweneliseka komshado laliphakeme kakhulu kulabo ababandakanyeka ekubukeni okumangazayo nokumangazayo kokuzijabulisa okusebenzayo.
Isivivinyo esinembile futhi esilawulwa ngokucophelela safakwa elabhoratri. Kwaphoqeleka uhhafu wokubhekana nokuthile okujwayelekile - ngokwesibonelo. Isigamu sesibili saphoqeleka ukuba sigelezele ukugembula okungajwayelekile nangokwendle, baboshelwe komunye nomunye ngamabhaqa kanye nezihlakala futhi baphoqelelwa ndawonye ukuyolahla, baphoqe izithiyo futhi baphoqelele amakhanda abunzima kakhulu.
Kwakudingeka ukukwenza lokhu okwesikhashana, futhi abahloli behle bagxuma futhi benza kanjalo amahlandla amabili lawo akwazi ukuhlangana ngezinsuku ezabekiwe, kwathi okwesithathu wayengeke akwazi. Lapho-ke izivivinyo ezijwayelekile sezivele zilinganise izinga lokweneliseka ngobuhlobo, futhi lalihlala livela ukuthi labo abaphoqe umgqomo wakhe bekhanda babephakeme kunalabo abahlangene, bahlanza amazambane.
Akukwenzi mqondo ukuhlanza amazambane ndawonye
Into esemqoka ukuthi lo mbono usihola - izeluleko zodokotela bezengqondo bachitha isikhathi esithe xaxa ndawonye ndawonye ndawonye ndawonye ndawonye ndawonye ndawonye ndawonye ndawonye ukubandakanyeka emizini - okuphelele. "Uma ubudlelwane bunganikeli amathuba wokwandisa lowo muntu, ukuthola abalingani eduze kobudlelwano kungalimaza kuphela." Ngamanye amagama, kungani uchitha isikhathi esithe xaxa ndawonye, uma ngabe lesi sikhathi sinikezelwe ukubuka ama-sealis afanayo futhi okuhlanzwa okufanayo?
UDkt Aron utusa ukugwema inqubo. Kucace bha ukuthi akuyona yonke imibhangqwana ezokwazi ukukhuphuka kuze kube-phakade noma incibilike emifuleni yezintaba. Kepha kunoma yikuphi, isidlo sakusihlwa kufanele sihambe isikhathi ngasinye indawo yokudlela ehlukile, futhi hhayi njalo. Futhi akunandaba ukuthi indawo yokudlela oyikhonzile ilungile, futhi wonke umuntu ujwayelekile. Kumele sizame ukuzama ukuzama izinto ezintsha zokuzilibazisa njalo ngempelasonto, zenze izinto ezihlukile, futhi zikwenze ndawonye.