Naphezu kweqiniso lokuthi ukukhangisa kusenza sikholelwe ukuthi le ntokazi icashile ngisho naseminyakeni enobungane obungenacala, kwabesifazane ababukeka bengaphansi kweminyaka yabo, ngalo kanye izinkinga eziningi!
1. I-Waltant Classic: Nginike ubhiya!
Ngaphandle kwepasipoti, okungenani ungaphumi endlini - ngaso sonke isikhathi lapho kufanele uphume ezintweni ezibanzi futhi uqinisekise ukuthi usuvele usukhulu futhi awuyi ebhodweni. Futhi usunesithombe sesibili sifakiwe, Nata-Ka! Kepha uma uhambisana nomhlaba ngemizwa ehlanekezelwe - konke akumiselwe ukuthela usizi lwakho. Futhi akunandaba ukuthi ungakanani uBartender onobungozi (futhi uyajabula, uKozhenka!) Ukuthi udinga kabi le nkinga yokudangala yantambama ngokuphuthumayo, njengokucindezelwa kwantambama ... yena, uGada hhayi ilayisense lokushayela, noma idiploma yokhetho. Ungu-wundurnal, nephuzu. Phuza ubisi.2. Sengisengase ngikwazi!
Lapho ekugcineni udlulise ukulawula kwephasiphothi enzima, ngifike esigabeni sefilimu "18+", basakubheka njengokuthi ubaleke ezifundweni futhi uvungule kusuka ekushayweni okumnyama. Iqonde kahle, yize ngoba awukhombisi kahle lapha, akukho lutho olusha. Ngiyazibuza ukuthi uzoba yini uma ubeka isikhathi sakho seseshini yakho? Usola futhi izithombe zocansi zezingane? ..
3. "I-Juicy" Mama
Ukukujabulele endlini ye-Roadm ngaphandle kwezimonyo, abantu ababamhlophe amajazi afihliwe: ngakho-ke, intombazane iyancomeka kakhulu ukuthi weza uvakashele umama, kodwa usuka lapha, bese uphuze ukuba uhambe lapha, bese uphuze ukuya esikoleni. Ini? Ubelethe izolo? Ahohonishi, lapho kulomhlaba luhamba kuphi ?! Ngabe wenza kanjani imisebenzi yasekhaya manje ukuze wenze nengane yakho ezandleni zakho? Iziqinisekiso zakho ezibuthakathaka ukuthi usuvele umshado wesibili, uthathwa njenge-otmazka kancane.4. Indoda nayo ibuhlungu
Uma akwanele ukuthi angabukeki njengePeter Pan, futhi akhulile kunawe, ngezikhathi ezithile athola okungathandeki: "Ngubani indodakazi yakho?" Futhi yena nje iminyaka eyisishiyagalombili ubudala. Ngaleso sikhathi ngaleso sikhathi ngokuqondene nobaba akakaze acabange ngisho nangowomdlalo endodakazini kamama, ebekelwe ngumakhelwane uLenka!
5. Ubheka phansi
By the way, uhola ngisho nangaphezulu kwalokho. Futhi ufunda uMamardashvili, futhi akayena. Futhi yebo, uyazi ukuthi yini i-infernal futhi yini ekhuthalayo, futhi ayinjalo. Kepha noma kunjalo, "mncane", "musa", futhi "igundane, kahle, uqondani ngakho." Ekuqaleni kumnandi kakhulu, kepha okuvame kakhulu! ..6. Konke ngakho kukukhumbuza wena
Okokuqala, bacabanga ukuthi lokhu kuyincoma okwangempela kokuqala - ukuzwa ukuthi uneminyaka emingaki, ujikeleze amehlo futhi uyamangala kanjani. Abaqageli ukuthi izincomo eziyi-101% ezibhekiswe kuwe zizwakala kanjena? Okwesibili, uma amafindo entatheli efinyelela kuwe, ngokuqinisekile azokubuza umbuzo wezimfihlo zobuhle bakho nentsha yakho. Futhi kuzodingeka, unqande, ngokujwayelekile uqamba amanga ngokuqina amahora angama-19 ngosuku kanye nomazisi kagogo kusuka ku-Prostokvashi. Well, wazalwa kanjalo, ngiyakuthola! Ubuyile esibhedlela somama ukuze umbungu! Cha, ungaqondi amahlaya. Bhala kahle: "Futhi futhi, abesifazane abathandekayo, udinga ukuhlala umamatheke futhi ubheke kahle ..." Bue.
7. Kunzima ukwenza umsebenzi
Lokhu kubaluleke kakhulu ngomhlathi wamatshe, ugcwele izimila eziqinile, ezingcolisiwe kuwe "Lenochka", futhi wena "Sergey Sergeich omncane kunawe mncane kunawe. Futhi useyinhloko yekhanda. Futhi usabheka intombazane ephakade kumabhuli. Yize ungakwazi nalokhu, futhi kunjalo, manje sekuyilo. Kepha akunangqondo, futhi yilokho. Bangaba ne-zama zava ukuba izihlathi ezipinki ezinjalo?
8. Umsebenzi we-Pedagogical umboziwe
Uma inhliziyo, umsebenzi kanye ne-diploma kukujezisa ekufundiseni, kuzofanela ube uqinile. Izingane zesikole kanye nabafundi bakujabulela ehhovisi okokuqala, bazojabula ngokumemeza ngokusemandleni: "Hawu, New, Cool!" Kubi kakhulu - okunobuthi ngeziqeshana zamaphepha. Esikhathini esizayo, kuzofanela unqobe kamuva isimo esithi "Ngiyinhloko." Yikuphi ozakwabo abanama-tallow -Imited banikezwa iso elilodwa elisindayo elivela ngaphansi kwezinkophe ezihlanganisiwe.9. Kunzima ukuphazamisa noma yikuphi
Lapha u-anti ucwila kusuka kwesine ku-Salesman njengoba kubukeka - ukuthi enye into iselula ivela ezandleni. Futhi uma icubungula iqoqo ngaphandle komugqa - kuzokhumula igagasi lakhe lomsindo kanye negunya ngqo ekugcineni komugqa. Futhi imizamo yakho yokuvikela amalungelo abo nokuzimela kwayo akubuke konke okungakholeki. Uze uhleke nezingane egcekeni ngokungavunyelwe. Ama-Dwarfs amabi, nakanjani.
10. Intsha Ephakade, Ingapheli Laphakade
Lapho umfazi okhulayo enquma ukuqeda ukulala kwe-hysterical mayelana "nentsha-zh-zh", ngasizathumisi esithile ijika laso likuhloselele. Makunikeze nje, yize empeleni usuqale izinkinga ngamalunga namalunga.11. I-Tiny inamathela kuwe
Ingane, shiya. Angikaze ngigqekeze ngaphambi kwalapho iminyaka iqala ukudonsa ngokumangazayo ku-padavanov encane. Futhi ngokuvamile, ngimelene ne-pedophilia. Ngabe ucabanga ukuthi ngisencane? Yebo, kulokhu, kulokhu, woza, uzoqhubeka: "Puzzy Pooh, ukushisa ..." Angazi-ke! Salag. Ngicabanga, futhi akazange ambone i-pager emehlweni. Shkotota. Kanye ne-T-Shift nge-Mickey Mouse ebanjwe. Kulezi zinsuku kwakuyisikolo, hhayi retro.
12. Uyasaba amadoda anembeza
Kubukeka ngabo ukuthi ungenzela wena kuphela, ngaphandle kwalapho kuphela ama-ficuses okukhula futhi adlale nge-preiledalky, njengaseMatilda. Ngekhodi besaba. Futhi abafuni ama-fikuses. Hhayi-ke, hhayi ukunamathela ebunzini lepasipoti, kepha!
13. ingcindezi encishisiwe
Labo ababukeka njengomncane kunaseminyakeni yabo, bavame ukunciphisa umfutho wegazi. Yebo, kunjalo, kuhle ukuthi bahlale naye isikhathi eside kunokuphakama. Impilo ende yokundiza ekwindla.14. EMnyangweni Wezingane Zakho, Baby!
Uma ukubuka kwakho okuncane nokuqhakaza kwezinga elikhulu kuhlotshaniswa nobukhulu obunobunzima obucishiwe, kuhlanganisa impilo ngaso leso sikhathi ngezindlela ezimbili. Okokuqala, izicathulo zakho nezingubo zakho zosayizi zibaluleke kakhulu nge-sitrobheli nama-bunnies. Okwesibili, noma ngabe uzulazula nge-invothive futhi wakha isudi eliqinile, umuntu uzokubheka ngokuqinisekile sengathi uyi-vikid kamama noma uMatinee egqoke.
15. Ngezinye izikhathi uwela ebuntwaneni
Lapho wonke umuntu ezungezile elwela ukubona wena omncane, wena ngokwakho uqala ukuyigcina. Futhi kulungile kungaba yinto engenacala ekudidekeni emehlweni, kuseyikhono eliwusizo. Kepha kwesinye isikhathi ngifuna ngempela ukuzindla ekhaleni ongabheka nale nto. Noma alimale kakhulu ngumthengisi ofanayo noma i-sysadmin. Stope ngezinkinobho, gcina! Kukhubekisa isilinganiso esincane esingesihle!