Rhoqo, amantombazana amaninzi azama ukuhlala abahlobo kunye nabangaphambili, kuba "yintoni le nto apha." Nangona kunjalo, phantsi kweemeko ezithile, ukuphucuka olunjalo kufuneka kuthintelwe nangayiphi na indleko. Kukho izizathu zekhonkrithi zendlela olwalamano lwangaphambili olwalukwaye lwangaphambili alunakulunga kakhulu.
1. Usezakuthanda
Iimvakalelo ezigciniweyo kunye nethemba eliyimfihlo libuye linokuba yinkuthazo eyomeleleyo ukuze uhlale zingabahlobo kunye nabangaphambili, kodwa le yeyona nto inokwenzeka. Ukuba umntu owayefundela ukuqonda ukuba akafuni ukuba nawe, mhlawumbi, kuncinci okunokwenziwa ukumenza atshintshe iingqondo zabo. Kwaye ukuba uqhubeka nokubona rhoqo, kuya kukhokelela ekuphindiweni kwentlungu kwaye ekugqibeleni ndindenze ndixinezeleke. Kufuneka sizame ukuchitha ixesha nabahlobo abakwenza uzive uthandwa kwaye uxabisekile. Okwangoku kusenokwenzeka ukuba akukho namnye kubo.2. Ilusizi ngaye
Ukuba ulwahlulo lwakho yayilukhetha kwaye nenu ngaphambili bayayibona imbi, ngokwemvelo, ukuba andifuni kuyenza kakubi, ndigatya isicelo sobuhlobo. Nangona kunjalo, oku kunokwenza ukuba avakalelwe nkqu nangakumbi.
Abantu bayathanda ukuziva ngathi baxhaswe ukuba bayayifuna, kodwa abayi kufuna ukuziva ngathi bayayifuna ngokwenene ukuba babenokhetho. Inkxaso yakho eqhubekayo ayinakwenzeka ukuba ibancede basinde kwaye baphile, nokuba bakhululekile ecaleni kwabo. Kuya kufuneka ukuba uqiniseke ukuba umsebenzi wangaphambili ufumana inkxaso evela kwabanye abantu ebomini bakhe, kwaye kungekuphela nje kuwe. Ukongeza, kufuneka umzise ngokunyaniseka, kwaye ungatsaleli ixesha elide.
3. Uziva unesithukuthezi
Ukuba udlule ngokwahlulela, kulula ukuziva ukuba ebomini bakho "umngxunya owenziwe", kwaye kunokuthatha ixesha ukuzalisa lo mngxunya. Ukuba uziva ulilolo ngolwesiHlanu ebusuku, isimemo sangaphambili besiya kwi-cinema sinokubonakala ngathi sinomtsalane kunokuzama ukuqhelana nabantu abatsha. Kodwa inokukhokelela nakwimbali ye "American Golkov" kubudlelwane, ezinokungaqiniseki ngakumbi, iingxaki ezinkulu kunxibelelwano, kunye nolwaneliseko oluncinci ngobomi. Ukungabikho kobudlelwane obusondeleyo kubudlelwane bothando kucacile. Nangona kunjalo, akunyanzelekanga ukuba kwenziwe nabo bangaphambili. Kungcono ukuchitha ixesha nosapho kunye nabahlobo.4. Ndiyathemba ukuba uya kuze atshintshe
Nokuba ungahlukanga ngenxa yokuvutha kweqabane okanye ngenxa yokuba wasebenzisa utywala okanye iziyobisi, phantse nabani na onamathemba ukuba uya kuthatha izifundo zakhe kwaye ngamanye amaxesha uya kukhula kwiqabane, elifuna. Ukuhlala abanye abahlobo, ungayigcina ikufuphi "kwaye, mhlawumbi umncede atshintshe kubengcono. Kodwa ayisoloko inokwenzeka ukuze ithemba lokufumana uvavanyo linokubakhuthaza abantu ukuba babe ngcono. Kodwa ukuba bangaphambili bakuva, 'enokulinganisa "into afuna ukuyitshintsha, ngokukodwa ukuze ahambe nje kufutshane. Sukuphoxeka ngakumbi.
5. Inketho yokuphumla
Abanye banokuba nomnqweno wokunxibelelana no-ex wayo ngetyala ukuba abanakufumana umntu ongcono. Ayiphumelanga ngaphandle kokutsho ukuba indlela enjalo ayilunganga ngokunxulumene nayo, kodwa inokukunqanda. Ngamanye amaxesha kuya kufuneka ulale ngokupheleleyo ubudlelwane, ukuba ufuna ukubopha abatsha.6. Ufuna ukumlandela
Ngokuqinisekileyo, emva kokuhlukanisa, abaninzi kuyenzakalise ukucinga ngento yokuba abantu ababefundwe ngabanye abantu bafumana ukuba abantu bafumane ubudlelwane bakho, nokuba uyazi ukuba ubudlelwane bakho abugqibelele. Ukuhlala nabahlobo, kulula ukunikezela kwisilingo sokulandela imihla yakhe kwaye simphembelele. Nangona kusenokulingwa, kodwa ukuba ungumntu "wetrasti" wakho, emva koko uhambile, awuzukuqiniseka kuye, ngakumbi ukuba ungaqinisekanga malunga nokuba yonke ikhula njani.
Nokuba usanda njengabahlobo kwi-facebook, inokukunika "i-Loophole" ebomini bakho ngaphambili. Kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba "ukulandela umkhondo" ku-facebook uthande ukomeleza ialam kunye nomona, kwaye ukuba kunzima kuwe ukumelana nendawo yabahlobo bayo.
7. Uhlukumeze 'kwi-Green Green "syndrome
Ukuba uqhubeka nokufumana iintsilelo zeqabane elitsha, kusenokubonakala ngathi zinomdla ngakumbi ukuba zinxibelelane ne-ex yakho. Rhoqo, ungaqala ngokuthoba umntu oqhelene naye, kuba ukhathazekile, ungazikhathaleli iintsilelo zayo kunye nemikhwa ecaphukisayo, "kodwa kufanelekile ukuba lo ngumgibe. Ukuba "ingca ithile kwenye indawo eluhlaza," awusoze wonwabe kwaye wanelisekile ngento onayo. Ukuba awonwabanga ngobudlelwane wangoku, kufanelekile ukuba uthethe ngayo kwaye uzame ukuphelisa ezi mvakalelo, kwaye ungabhekise kwinkxaso yangaphambili okanye njengenketho yokufumana. Iyenza kuphela imeko.
Ke, ngaba siphi na isizathu sokuhlala nabahlobo kunye nabo bangaphambili. Ukuba akukho njongo ifihliweyo efanayo nakwezo zidweliswe apha ngasentla, kwaye ukuba ubuhlobo bakho abuchaphazeli ubudlelwane bakho obukhoyo ngoku (olona vavanyo lubalaseleyo kukuba ukhululekile ukuba unxibelelane neqabane lakho elitsha kunye nexesha elinye, nokuba ibikhona Iqabane liziva lilungile xa ukufutshane), ke kutheni kungenjalo.
Kukufanelekile ukuba uqiniseke ukuba unyanisekile kwiinjongo zakho zenyani malunga nokuba unxibelelana ngakumbi nangaphambili.