Abantu abaninzi bajamelana nento enjalo njengabahlobo abangafakwanga. Kulapho usayalithanda iqabane, ibe sele ilahle. Kulapho ukuqhekeka kobudlelwane kwenzekile, kwaye awukalindelanga kwaye akafuni. Kulapho ukungcatshakwe kwesiqingatha sesibini kwenzeka ngexesha elihlelwe luthando. Ngamanye amagama, ukuba ubudlelwane buyanda, apho umntu akanakwamkela khona, umanyano lungabi nalo.
Ubudlelwane obungalunganga bungekho mbutho, kodwa i-intechological kunye nemvakalelo kwiqabane langaphambili. Umntu unokufikelela nolwalamano olutsha nelinye iqabane, kodwa ubukho beemvakalelo kunye nokubophelela komphefumlo wakhe kwaye ubophelele kowokumenza ukuba akhusele kwaye abe lusizi emva kwakhe.
Ulwalamano olungapheliyo kufuneka luyekisiwe, lusondele, uyeke kwixesha elidlulileyo. Kulula ukuthi, kodwa kunzima ukwenza, ngakumbi xa ungazi ukuba wenze ntoni. Nika olo cebiso lunceda ukugqibezela into esele ishiye ixesha elide
1. Thatha inyathelo olwalungenalo ixesha lokwenza ekupheleni kobudlelwane. Ngamanye amagama, ukubopha ngokweemvakalelo kubudlelwane bangaphambili kukuba umntu akakhange athethe into okanye engakhange ayenze ngeqabane lakhe langaphambili, ekugqibeleni akhulule yonke into.
Isenokuba yingxoxo entle, apho umntu isixelela khona ngamava akhe kwaye uhleli eviwe. Inokuba yimpindezelo xa umntu ebona intuthumbo yeqabane lakhe langaphambili. Oku kunokuba yinto ethile, umzekelo, ukwaphula ubudlelwane kwisicelo sakho.
Yintoni kanye kanye ekugcinweni kwakho? Yintoni onqwenela ukuyenza kunye neqabane lakho langaphambili, ukuze ekugqibeleni uzolile kwaye ushiye yonke into ngaphambili? Kuyimfuneko ukuqonde oko ufuna, emva koko wenze inqwenele inyani. Oku kungenziwa: • neqabane lakho, ukuba uyavuma kwaye uya kufikeleleka. • Ngogqirha wezengqondo oya kudlala indima yomthandi wangaphambili. • Ngomntu omtsha othandekayo oya kuba namdla.
Ngamanye amagama, ukugqibezela ubudlelwane obude baphelise loo nto, kufuneka wenze loo nto okanye uxele la mazwi ndingathanda ukuchaza ukuba umphefumlo ekugqibeleni uye wazola kwaye uzolile.
2. Ukuqonda ukungabi nakukuqhubeka nokuqhubeka ubudlelwane, ukungabikho kwexesha elizayo nalowo ubambekileyo. Apha awufuni ukuzicenga. Faka isicelo sendlela yokubonisa (ukubonwa). Khawufane ucinge ukuba yonke into yenzeka ngendlela obungathanda ngayo - umntu omthandayo uza kuwe kwaye ufuna ukuba nolwalamano nawe. Ngaba uyayamkela? Ngaba uyamthemba? Ngaba uyakholelwa ukuba yonke into izakulunga nawe?
Qonda ukuba iqabane langaphambili sele lenzile yonke into ukuze umyekise ukuba athembele kwaye ahlonipha, athande kwaye uyayixabisa. Utshabalalise ubudlelwane bakho okanye ukubakho kobunye ubukho babo. Sele enyule abo baya kuba ngabahlobo kwaye bakhe ubudlelwane bothando. Into ayinika yona emva kokuba intshabalalo yemanyano ayihambelani kubudlelwane bothando.
Ngamanye amagama, khawucinge nje ngento ongathanda ukuba neqabane lakhe, uze uzibuze: "Ngaba kunokwenzeka:" Ngaba kunokwenzeka emva kwayo yonke loo mntu sele efundile kwaye enifumene kweliphi icala? " Esazi ukuba umnqweno wakho awunakwenzeka nje, kuba akusakholwa ukuba umntu omelwe kukuba nenxaxheba ekuphunyezweni.
Ubudlelwane obungalunganga buhlala bumnyama bubu bumnyama bubomi bomntu kwaye bulibazise ixesha elide kwixesha elidlulileyo. Sukukhawula izigameko kwaye uzinike ixesha lokuphambuka. Kodwa musa ukuqiqa ukuze ulibale ixesha elidlulileyo ukuze ungakutyhili.