Ntabwo arukuri ko ishyingiranwa ryiza ntirizahamagarwa. Twe ubwacu twubaka uru rubanza, urayisenga, kandi buri gihe kandi ushishikaye kuzana iki kintu. Kandi mubisanzwe tujya kumuhanga mukorana ahantu hamwe nyuma yimyaka 6 nyuma yo gukenera gusana ...
John Gottman avuga rero ko inzobere idasanzwe mu gusana ishyingiranwa ryiza n'umusaba ikigo cyose cy'ubushakashatsi. Yatsimbataje inyigisho zose, imyaka 25 ashakisha amagana y'abashakanye. Ni ubuhe buryo bufite agaciro - umuhanga mu by'imitekerereze kuva kera kandi yubatse neza. Ariko ntabwo ari amahirwe! N'ubumwe, ubumwe bwabwo bwarushije gutandukana - kandi buzana ibintu byinshi byingirakamaro. Gotty rero ntabwo agira inama mbi! Gukuramo formula ye yubukwe bwiza ninama, uburyo bwo kohereza kuruhande rwinshi;)
1. Ubucuti hagati ya m na W.
Irahari, yego. Kandi ntabwo ari inzitizi, no gushyingirwa! Ibinyuranye, ibintu byose bibitswe kubyerekeye mukuru wa baleine. Abafatanyabikorwa bombi barimo gushora imari basanzwe: Inyungu, amarangamutima, gahunda, ibyifuzo n'ibyiringiro. Niba ufite page-rider kuri we, ariko ntushobora kujyanwa kuri korari kubintu runaka, iyi ni inzogera iteye ubwoba. Kuberako patch iraza n'amababi, ariko irashobora kubyuka. Niba uzi kuvugana. No kuvugana numuntu udakunda - Nafig akeneye?
2. Isuku ya vacuum nka aphrodisiac
Umugabo ufasha munzu itera umufatanyabikorwa gukurura cyane. Byose kuko kubyo avuga ko akunda na: humura, nshuti. Ndagukunda cyane kubwibyo kubwawe ndetse winjije icyiciro kidahagije hamwe nimyanda. Birakonje kuruta kubona mamoth.
3. Kugaburira
Mubuzima bwa buri munsi duhora dusabana. Kandi hamwe n'inyandiko z'ingenzi ("tekereza, ntibanyishyuye byinshi!"), No ku bituntu ("yewe, reba iyo ce!"). Reaction irashobora kuba itandukanye: "Yego", "ntugire ikibazo, ndahuze", injangwe? "Injangwe? Na "Inter" -Ihindagurika! " Cyangwa - urabyitwaramo byuzuye: ntacyo bitwaye kubyo uvuga, ariko urabyitayeho, twitwara neza, "hindukira" kumufatanyabikorwa. Kenshi na kenshi bibaho, amahirwe menshi ugomba kurera umutima ukomeye. Abashakanye bose bize Abashakanye bavuga ko "bahindukiriye" mu manza za gatatu gusa baratandukanye mu myaka mike.
4. Ineza izarokora ubukwe
Ntabwo byoroshye, ntabwo ari ubudahemuka, ntabwo ari amarangamutima. Ubu bushobozi ntibusimbukira mu bigori kandi ntibarambire ibinyoma. Gottman yemera ko ineza atari ikintu kitari cyangwa kitari. Ikimeze nkimitsi ikeneye guhora witoza. Kandi bizakuzana mugihe gikomeye. Kandi umwanya ukomeye cyane ni, birumvikana ko amakimbirane. Nukuri, abantu bose bagaragaje ko rimwe na rimwe mu munota utoroshye wababaje "batwara" kugirango badashobora gusa gusuzugura, ntibafungirire amatwi yo gusaba imbabazi. Nibyiza, rero - ubushobozi bwo gukora ibi ntibigomba gutozwa injangwe. Ni ukuvuga, ku muryango muto ushimishije.
5. Amakosa agomba kubabarira
Niba umufatanyabikorwa yishimye akavuga ubupfu, nkore iki? Shyira isafuriya ... ni ukuvuga kumumenyesha ko yibeshye hano - kandi yibagirwa no kubabarira. Bitabaye ibyo, igisasu cyicyifuzo gitangiye muri wewe, wanyuma nyuma yigihe kimwe kumutwe we wa Ka -KU uburozi! Na none: kubabarira kandi ureke. Niba mubyukuri byari imbaraga zihuse. Kandi ntabwo ari byiza cyane.
6. Gukemura ntibishoboka kubyemera
Ubu nkaho amakuru ateye agana. 69 ku ijana by'ibibazo byo mu muryango birashobora gukemurwa mu ihame. Nibura, tumenagura urukuta cyangwa tukagabana, abizerwa - ibikorwa bimwe byibanze ntibizahinduka. Niba kandi bitwaza ko bahinduka, bizaba bikomeretsa cyane ... cyangwa kwibeshya. Hamwe nibintu bimwe na bimwe byubwoko bwimiyoboro ipakururwa cyangwa inkombe ihambiriye igomba kuba ifite kubana gusa. Nibyiza, cyangwa wiruka muri bo. Ni ngombwa kumvikana neza icyo muri wewe.
7. gatanu kuri imwe
Buri jambo rifite umunezero n'iyaba. Gushima n'amazina. Umunezero n'inzika. Kwibuka neza na skeleti mu kabati. Noneho! Chip yubukwe bwiza ntabwo ari uko nta mikino. Kandi kuba minus buringo bigomba kugira inyungu eshanu. Umunsi umwe watongana - iminsi itanu yo gukira. Kuri sock imwe yatereranye - indabyo za daise eshanu. N'ibindi Birashimishije kugerageza kubara igeragezwa kubwubuki! ..
7 Abateranya Gothtman Soviets
1. Ntiwibagirwe ubufasha Impuzandengo, Gotthan, ndetse yumva ko hari ikintu cyagiye kuri byose, kikurura hamwe nubukangurambaga mumitekerereze yumuryango. Kandi birengeje imyaka igera kuri itandatu. Kandi birashoboka kumarana mugihe no kuyobora neza.
2. Kuyungurura "BazaI"!
Nubwo ibitekerezo byahagaritswe. Kora imbaraga kandi ntukibuke ibyaha byimyaka irindwi, ntukavuge inenge ababaza kandi ntuhamagare amagambo mabi. Ibiti. Mu kurangiza, umusego wa Kin. Ariko ntukamuga.
3. Shakisha kubaka Ati: "Ni kangahe nakubwiye, utera imbaraga" - ikora kugirango usuke uburakari kandi ukureho. Ariko ntabwo kugirango ugere kubyo wifuza. Itera kwirwanaho kutumva hamwe nigitero gikaze. Mu buryo bwikora kandi bwumvikana. "Umva, nkeneye ubufasha bwawe ..." Ariko iyi ni yo, muke gukemura ikibazo.
4. Gerageza guhura Biragaragara ko kwiheba, inyungu zawe nubuzima bwawe ntabwo ari urukundo, ahubwo ni umuntu. Ariko ntabwo ari ibintu byingenzi byingenzi (nka: "he uzakoresha nimugoroba wo kuwa gatandatu - mu kabari cyangwa mama") biracyakenewe kugirango bishoboke. Rimwe na rimwe.
5. Ntutinye kubiha icyubahiro
Ntabwo ari muburyo: "M-man, T-Wowe Uh-Vazha-Urye?" Kandi muburyo bumwe niba muburyo bwawe bwo kwihesha agaciro no kwihesha agaciro byari boot, ntibishobora kumira no kwibagirwa. Bizaba bibi. Tugomba ijwi. Niba umuntu adakwiye - azirikana. Niba ari umufatamizi ku muvuduko mu myifatire, nta tera yo kuburamo kubungabunga izagufasha. Mu itanura ryabo - n'amaboko mu maguru.
6. Tera imbere hamwe ninyuma ebyiri Guhangana n'amakimbirane, bimukira ku bitero, ntukibagirwe gukora "retreat." Andika: "Ndumva ko utamerewe neza," Ndababaye, niba bisa naho bigaragara, ". Ibi ntabwo ari intege nke, ni aikido ya psychologiya. Mugusoza, niba irari ryarangiye kugirango ntakazi gashingiye, nka reboot, urashobora kubona kuruhande rutunguranye kandi rwibanze kugirango usohoke - cyangwa gukora igihe cyo guhuza.
7. Ibyiza - bitanu! Iyi ishobora kuba itegeko ryingenzi rya Canton murukundo nubusabane bwubumuntu. Reba paragarafu ya 7 uhereye kumurongo wubukwe bwiza - hanyuma uzane uko ubishoboye, ushimishije, ibyiza kandi bidashira. Noneho ingano ya "izuba" rwose irenze urugero bwa "igicu" inshuro eshanu. Kandi uzishima!
