Gutwita, birashoboka, igihe gituje mububyeyi. Ariko, itariki yo kubyara, ntabwo ituje mama uzakomeza. Kandi inkuru zibabaje ziteye ubwoba zerekeye kubandi bantu, no guhatira umugore kumva utishoboye.
Internet irasa na blog n'amahuriro ku mibanire n'abagore barimo, benshi bavuga uko abaganga aho cyangwa bagashyira mu bikorwa imbaraga z'ababyeyi b'ejo hazaza. Abavandimwe n'abaziranye nabo ntibabura umwanya kandi byanze bikunze bafite inkuru ebyiri zerekana uburyo mwene mugenzi we Kuma yasize kubyara, kimwe cyangwa, uburyo umuntu yahise asimburana. Ituze kandi ituze gusa. Kuvuka ntabwo biterwa gusa nibikorwa bya muganga gusa, ahubwo binaturutse ku gitsina gabo. Kubwibyo, igihe cyakoreshejwe kuri foruru nicyiza gushira mu cyerekezo cyamahoro no kwitegura inzira yo kuvuka k'umwana no gufata icyemezo cyo kujyana umugabo cyangwa atari.
Fata cyangwa ntugafate, nikibazo
Nubwo umugabo wawe ari ubwoba bwubwoba, fata kubyara. Mubaze ko akwirukana uzahorana umwanya.
Byongeye kandi, abaganga ubwabo babona niba umufatanyabikorwa yiteguye gukomera kugeza inzira irangiye. Niba umugabo atinye cyangwa ukuhaba kwe arangaza umugore uri kubyara, azasabwa gusa gutegereza hanze yumuryango. Nk'uburyo, igihe cyibikoresho kubagabo ngwatembere. Niba kandi imikorere ya kopi igomba gutangwa, umugabo yabanje kumenyana n'umwana, naho mama mu cyumba cyo gukoreramo, papa mu gatuza aremerera igikona.
Umuntu wese azi ko umugore yumva Mama, akimara kumenya gutwita, no kumenyana umuntu ko ari Papa nyuma yo kuvuka gusa.
Amahugurwa kubufatanye
Kuvuka ni inzira ishinzwe kandi igoye atari nyina wa nyina gusa, ahubwo no kuri papa.Inkunga kumuntu ukunda irakenewe gusa. Abagabo bavuka abagore benshi, ariko uwambere ntashobora kubigiramo uruhare, ariko amahirwe ya kabiri ntabwo. Kubwibyo, niba washyizweho kugirango ukorere kubyara, muburyo bwose arinda uwahisemo mumakuru yabandi, abagabo badasobanutse muri ibi bibazo. Vuga uburyo azaba uwambere kubona umwana we. Sangira na papa uzaza ufite ibyiyumvo byawe nubunararibonye, na none nta nkuru zivamye. Mbwira ukuntu inkunga no kwitabwaho mugihe cyo kubyara ni ngombwa. Sobanura ko kuva mu ntangiriro yibikorwa rusange mbere yuko umwana avuka ashobora kunyura isaha arenga imwe. Kandi muriki gihe, ukeneye ubufasha bworoshye: Ubufasha buhaguruka, kwicara kwa muganga, kora massage, kugaburira amazi, muri iki gihe ntushobora gusa kurya, ariko no gusinzira).
Ninde ukwiye gutanga mbere
Buri mugore asusurutsa inzozi ko ari umugabo we, nk'intwari ya firime y'Abanyamerika, azavuga ati: "Nikundira nawe, nzanyura mu ivuka ry'urugo rwacu, hanyuma nzaba bavutse hasi."
Mubyukuri, abagabo ntibafatwa nabi mubibazo byubufatanye kandi barashobora gutura mubiganiro nkibi, muburyo bwose busuka igisubizo, amaherezo, batanga uruhushya, gusa kutababaza umugore wabo.
Niba uhisemo ko kuboneka k'umugabo mu kubyara ari urufunguzo rwo gutuza no kwigirira icyizere, tanga icya mbere. Ubwiza hamwe no kujijuka kw'abagabo ku bufatanye, abaganga b'abagore babitewe n'amasomo, bakora amasomo kubagore batwite. Amasomo menshi yeguriwe ubufatanye neza bushoboka kandi buzafasha kumvisha umugabo we agaciro ke mugihe cyo kubyara.
Nigute wahindura umubano nyuma yubufatanye
Akenshi abagore bahura nubufatanye bazasenya ubuzima bwimbitse. Nibyo, nta mpinduka zizatwara, ariko, nkitegeko, ibyiza. Abagabo bahoraga bakora cyane kugirango bafate umugore wabo muburiri.
Gufatanya kubyara gushimangira umuryango.
Umugabo yiteguye kugira uruhare mubuzima bwumwana, akanguka nijoro igihe umwana arira, agenda afasha umugore, afasha umugore we ibibazo byo murugo. Abwira inshuti kandi akishimira inshuti n'abamenyereye, aziranye ko yari afite kubyara, nubwo mbere yacyo kandi yanga no kuvuga ku bufatanye.
Kubwibyo, kubibazo byo kumenya niba no gukundana nanjye kuba kubyara, igisubizo ni kimwe: menya neza.